When I entered 2014, it was with the intention of focusing on taking the steps I need to achieve my dreams. I have a lot of "someday I'd like to" in my life, and I decided that "someday" was no longer good enough. I've been studying a lot of different ideas and methods for achieving your dreams and goal setting, and combining that with my art journaling.
One of the exercises I did talked about the qualities you want to have when you reach your dreams. Unless you develop those qualities on the way to your dream, you aren't going to be happy once you get there. That's why, when a lot of people reach certain goals, they're still unhappy. I can attest to that feeling of unhappiness with reaching goals. I stopped setting goals at one point because I was tired of getting what I wanted, but not being any happier. So this exercise asks you to focus your attention on what qualities and feelings you want to have when you reach your goals and fulfill your dreams.
I started thinking about what I wanted to feel, what qualities I wanted in my life, and, going back to those things that didn't make me happy, I thought about what I thought getting those things would make me feel, and I put those down as well. As I looked at the things I put on paper, I realized something very powerful. Getting my dreams was less about having certain things as it was about the kind of person I wanted to be. More importantly, I realized that I could be that person and have those things without ever accomplishing any of my actual life goals. Even if none of my dreams every came true, I could still be content with my life. That's not to say I don't have dreams. But I realized that my worth is not dependent on the outcome of my dreams.
Many times, when we set goals, we think that by achieving that thing, we're going to get something else. Maybe it's love, acceptance, confidence, happiness, success, peace, or some other amorphous thing we can't really define. A lot of times, it really isn't about the goal, but about that underlying quality we want to get. As I thought about my goals and the underlying emotions and qualities, I realized that I would probably reach my goals faster if I actually worked on the qualities I want in my life first. Even better, though, was the realization that this journey is a lot like the Wizard of Oz. Whether it's the Cowardly Lion, the Tin Man, or the Scarecrow, the very thing we seek already resides within us. We just need to dig in and make use of it.
What are your dreams?
What qualities do you hope to gain when you finally reach your dreams?
Is there something you could be doing now to bring about those qualities? What's inside of you that you need to bring out?
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Sunday, June 15, 2014
Tuesday, June 03, 2014
Sharing a few happy thoughts...
[caption id="attachment_4568" align="alignleft" width="300"] Watching this mama swan and her babies in Kensington Gardens was so joyful! How could anyone have thought those precious little babies were ugly?[/caption]
[caption id="attachment_4569" align="alignleft" width="300"] Beautiful duck watching over the babies beside The Serpentine.[/caption]
[caption id="attachment_4570" align="alignleft" width="300"] Clearly my time in Kensington Gardens and Hyde park was all about the birds. Isn't this a handsome fellow?[/caption]
[caption id="attachment_4571" align="alignleft" width="300"] Beautiful rose in Hyde Park[/caption]
[caption id="attachment_4572" align="alignleft" width="300"] More beautiful gardens in Hyde Park. Imagine sitting in here and inhaling all the fragrant flowers. Bliss![/caption]
It's been a weird few days. I had family visiting (LOVED it) and yet, every interaction with someone in the outside world ended up with me scratching my head wondering how so many narcissists can exist in this world without the universe imploding.
Last week, I created a really cool calendar of things to blog about and when, and somehow I lost it. Then, today, I got an email saying that my blog server had been updated, so I logged on and realized that I lost a bunch of comments. So if you commented on my blog recently, and you don't see it, my apologies. I promise I didn't delete it on purpose. :)
So how do those two thoughts go together?
It made me think about happy thoughts and the need to share more of them. As I was getting angry over watching some really selfish people do some really selfish things to others, then to find a lot of my plans going awry, I realized that my anger and frustration doesn't do anyone any good. I can complain about narcissists all day long, but a narcissist is not going to read my complaint and think, "wow, I really am a narcissist. I should stop." And all the good people reading my complaints just get frustrated at the narcissists, and that doesn't do them any good!
I could also complain about all the various things that have just gone wrong in the past few days, and while I could get sympathy, the reality is, it doesn't do anything to fix the situation.
Which is why I'm going to happy thoughts mode. A lot of bad stuff is out there. If you scroll through Facebook today, you can read all about people's horrible happenings. And some joyful ones, like my friend just became a grandma for the second time to a super cute baby! So I'm choosing to think on the happy things. I'm ignoring the negative garbage, and I'm re-filling my good news happy tank.
What fills your good news happy tank? Share yours, and maybe between all of us, we can brighten everyone's day! If you look at the pictures, those are some of my happy tank pictures. I don't know why, but there's something about taking pictures of pretty flowers that makes me happy. I hope people will look at them and see a little beauty that will give them a smile.
[caption id="attachment_4569" align="alignleft" width="300"] Beautiful duck watching over the babies beside The Serpentine.[/caption]
[caption id="attachment_4570" align="alignleft" width="300"] Clearly my time in Kensington Gardens and Hyde park was all about the birds. Isn't this a handsome fellow?[/caption]
[caption id="attachment_4571" align="alignleft" width="300"] Beautiful rose in Hyde Park[/caption]
[caption id="attachment_4572" align="alignleft" width="300"] More beautiful gardens in Hyde Park. Imagine sitting in here and inhaling all the fragrant flowers. Bliss![/caption]
It's been a weird few days. I had family visiting (LOVED it) and yet, every interaction with someone in the outside world ended up with me scratching my head wondering how so many narcissists can exist in this world without the universe imploding.
Last week, I created a really cool calendar of things to blog about and when, and somehow I lost it. Then, today, I got an email saying that my blog server had been updated, so I logged on and realized that I lost a bunch of comments. So if you commented on my blog recently, and you don't see it, my apologies. I promise I didn't delete it on purpose. :)
So how do those two thoughts go together?
It made me think about happy thoughts and the need to share more of them. As I was getting angry over watching some really selfish people do some really selfish things to others, then to find a lot of my plans going awry, I realized that my anger and frustration doesn't do anyone any good. I can complain about narcissists all day long, but a narcissist is not going to read my complaint and think, "wow, I really am a narcissist. I should stop." And all the good people reading my complaints just get frustrated at the narcissists, and that doesn't do them any good!
I could also complain about all the various things that have just gone wrong in the past few days, and while I could get sympathy, the reality is, it doesn't do anything to fix the situation.
Which is why I'm going to happy thoughts mode. A lot of bad stuff is out there. If you scroll through Facebook today, you can read all about people's horrible happenings. And some joyful ones, like my friend just became a grandma for the second time to a super cute baby! So I'm choosing to think on the happy things. I'm ignoring the negative garbage, and I'm re-filling my good news happy tank.
What fills your good news happy tank? Share yours, and maybe between all of us, we can brighten everyone's day! If you look at the pictures, those are some of my happy tank pictures. I don't know why, but there's something about taking pictures of pretty flowers that makes me happy. I hope people will look at them and see a little beauty that will give them a smile.
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