Leading Women Who Wound by Kelley Mathews and Sue Edwards.
As more churches add women’s ministry programs, there is a growing need to address the issues that naturally arise as women minister alongside one another and to one another. Given the fallen nature of the human heart as well as the complexities of personalities, conflict is an inevitable aspect of ministry. How do women deal with emotions when other women are insensitive, manipulative, or just plain mean? What does the Bible tell us? To be equipped for conflict, women must understand and master strategies specifically related to conflict with other women.
Leading Women Who Wound shows women how to effectively deal with conflict within their ministries. Seasoned women’s ministry leaders themselves, Sue Edwards and Kelley Mathews walk through several different aspects of conflict resolution including self-examination, identification of potential sources of conflict, tools for conflict resolution, and insight on how to prevent and move beyond conflict to minister to those who have been sources of contention. Recognizing that not all conflict results in a happy ending, Leading Women Who Wound gives the tools necessary to minister effectively and move forward with integrity.
About the Authors:
Kelley Mathews
Kelley Mathews is a freelance writer and copy editor. She began her mothering career after earning her Master of Theology
from Dallas Theological Seminary. She and her husband live in Texas with their three children.
Learn more about Kelley at http://www.newdoors.info/.
Sue Edwards
Sue Edwards is assistant professor of Christian Education at Dallas Theological Seminary, where she is leading the development of the Women in Ministry concentration, and has received awards for her excellence in education. She and her husband have two children and four grandchildren.
Learn more about Sue at http://www.newdoors.info/
Leading Women Who Wound
Release: February 1, 2009
Soft cover, 224 pp., $13.99, 8.3 x 5.5 x 0.6 inches
Non-Fiction, Women’s Studies
ISBN: 0802481531
When I first heard about this book, I knew I had to read it. I've been dealing with a conflict with a woman for a while and I've felt powerless to do anything about it. This person has said a lot of hurtful things to me in the name of being helpful and I've had a hard time figuring out how to respond. While I'm not in a position of leadership in my dealings with this person, I thought that by reading this book, I'd be able to learn better methods of dealing with the situation rather than letting it eat me up.
I devoured this book as soon as I got it. I really enjoyed how the authors used story to convey their message. I also thought it helpful how they provided resources for further reading. As I read the book, I found ways I can improve my communication with others. More importantly, I learned that I was not alone in my struggle. I could definitely relate to some of the ways we blame ourselves... was I just a hard person to get along with? Could I just not see all the horrible things I'd done to deserve how this person treats me? I was amazed how much I internalize things and take them personally.
After reading the book, I was able to see that while I don't always respond appropriately to this person, that it isn't about me and what I've done wrong, but about her, and her motivations. I've been praying for a long time that God would help me find a way to love her. I've tried, and I haven't found a way to do it. As I prayed about her last night, one of the things I realized is that she tends to attack me when I appear happy. She is a very unhappy woman. When I read about the dynamics of female relationships and how we have to feel like we're among equals, I wondered if maybe she doesn't view me as her equal. That maybe, even though I've never set myself up as being better than her, she views me as thinking I am, so she uses the opportunities she can find to tear me down. Maybe I'm overanalyzing it. And maybe, because I have never talked to her about it, I'm way off base. But it helped me to be more sympathetic towards her to realize that she is acting from within her own insecurities.
Am I ready to call her up and invite her for coffee? Um, no. I still have my own insecurities, and I'm not sure I'm ready to listen to her negativity. Yep, see right there I'm already using the assumption that it's going to be negative. Which means I still have a long way to go in learning how to deal with conflict. I think we need a book about getting over it and dealing with our own insecurities.
Having read this book and been able to see some of the things in my life I need to deal with, I definitely recommend this book. To anyone who has to deal with a woman. Hmmm... that's just about everyone, I think.
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