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Thursday, April 02, 2009

My Britney Spears Dilemma

So let's just get this out there... I don't like Britney Spears. I think it's awful that they turned a little girl into a sexy woman-child whose life is now out of control. She is a terrible role model and I don't particularly like her music.

That said, you can't deny that she's popular with young girls. I thought, that at 8 and 4, mine were too young to fall under her spell. I was wrong.

Today, as I sat on my computer, I heard strains of "oops I did it again." And I thought, huh, neighbors must be outside working. Then I thought, um, no, they listen to Mexican pop music. Crap. It's coming from my basement.

And there they were, my two little girls rocking out to that song on You Tube. Apparently, my 8 year old's best friend (also 8) is a HUGE Britney fan. Double crap.

I sat my daughters down and explained to them that I don't think Britney sings about nice things and that I think she's a bad example and I'd prefer they don't listen to her, etc. The 4 year old pipes up and says, "But what about Womanizer?"

*insert hysterical scream*

Then I asked them, "Do you even know what a womanizer is?" Dull looks. I explained that a womanizer is a man who treats women bad and is mean to them. Did they think that was a good thing to sing about? Well, no, they admitted. But it has a great beat they can dance to.

*banging head against wall*

So I am asking, begging, even, for some help.

First, are there good, clean musicians out there who have a good beat like Britney Spears? Any music recommendations? I promised the girls I'd help them find some music we could all be happy with.

Second, I'd love some thoughts on handling the situation in general. Not only can I not control what they watch/listen to outside my supervision, but I don't want to. I want them to learn to make good choices about their music and entertainment. I don't want to be the mean mom who bans all the good stuff. So how do you balance promoting good values with the crap we're bombarded with?


Niki said...

Hi Danica! :)

First of all, your girls are too young to make all of those mature decisions you want them to eventually be able to make. They need guidance now so they are able to make good choices for themselves in the future. I have a 6 year old daughter, so I understand your dilemma. I think "controlling" is generally a word we don't want to embrace, but the fact is, we're the parents and that's what we do. We control what comes into and goes out of our homes. It's our job. We are the filter because we love our kids and want what is best for them and we need to train them. From the sound of things, I'd say you handled it very well.

Yes, there is good music out there. Britney never has and never will own the corner market on good beats to dance to. :)

Let me add another controversial spin on your dilemma. (fun, fun) I'm a mom who encourages my daughter to listen to Disney stuff. Some of my more conservative friends gasp at the thought. I don't care. The way I see it, they aren't singing about sex and other "mature" themes all the time. Is some of the Disney stuff crap? Yes. Is all of it? No way. Zoe and I listen together and evaluate what we hear, then talk through it. It's a shorter process than it sounds. We also make our own Mix CD's of music she loves and I can approve of. She likes music from Disney movies, a lot of Christian artists and many other sources too. We hear great songs in some of the movies we watch. We love iTunes. The library is a great resource for listening to music first to see if you want to purchase it.

Music is a big part of my family's life, but we do our best to make sure it matches up to our value system as well. There are decent and wholesome lyrics out there that match any type of dancing beat you're interested in. :)

Bottom line...you DO have control (for now) and I believe that's the way it was meant to be. We are always going to be bombarded with crap. What we do with the crap is what matters. :) Hope that helps.

A google search can help you find alternatives choices for whatever style of music you're looking for. Good luck!

Danica Favorite said...

Thanks Niki... I definitely agree with your perspective. I want to be the filter. It bugs me that kids are singing about womanizers and they don't have a clue!

As for the Disney debate, I think it depends on what Disney music we're talking about. I HATE HATE HATE Hannah Montana. I think she is a smart-mouthed brat and a very poor role model for children. She's already been banned from my house.

I'd love to hear your suggestions on the Disney stuff you guys like. I just did not imagine we'd already be dealing with Britney Spears. So wrong! Just goes to show how fast these kids grow up. Too fast, IMO.

Jan Parrish said...

Try this gal, she is really awesome. I suggest you surround them with great music you approve of.

Danica Favorite said...

Thanks for the suggestion, Jan!

Dayle James Arceneaux said...

Stacy Orrico's first album sounded alot like that style of music. I bought a copy for my niece.

Danica Favorite said...

thanks for the suggestion!