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Friday, October 10, 2008

Precious Moments

As many of you know, my Panera time is precious. It's my get away from it all and focus on writing time that I get three days a week. I savor that time. This week, I lost two days of Panera time. Monday, I volunteered at my daughter's book fair while the little one was in preschool. Today, B was off school, so I had her with me.

I have to admit, I've been a little resentful about giving up my Panera time. Summer without Panera time was miserable.

Last week, when my daughter was telling about being off school, realizing that her sister still had school, she said in a very excited tone, "Mommy! I get to have special Panera time with you!"

Again, because I am a less than perfect mommy, I thought, "GRR! That's MY time!" But I smiled and said, "sure, we can go to Panera."

As the days for our joint Panera venture drew near, her excitement grew. All she could talk about was how she got to go to Panera with Mommy. And I realized, how awesome is that to know that the very best thing my daughter could think of was going to her mom's favorite place to have a cup of tea and spend time together? One day, she's going to be too busy, or maybe not interested in hanging out with her old mom. How precious that I get that time now.

And then I thought of these folks I see regularly at Panera. It's an older couple, and they're there every time I am, having a cup of coffee and reading the paper. But every once and a while, their daughter joins them with her baby. I first noticed them when she was pregnant, and over the past year, I've watched her baby grow up.

At Panera, I've seen groups of little old ladies doing their Bible study, multi-generational groups come together to knit, businessmen doing their deals, people getting hired, people getting fired, and I can't help but think what an honor it is that I get to be a part of it all, even if it's only from a distance.

So today, I brought my little girl to Panera. I got my tea, she got hot chocolate. We shared a bagel. She told me about a song she's writing about the invisible friend sitting next to us that everyone has. God. She was so passionate about sharing that with me. I realized that if we'd stayed home, I'd have spent the morning yelling at her to clean her room or something like that. But because we went to Panera, we shared breakfast, we shared conversation, and we shared lives.

I hope that 10 or 15 years from now, she still wants to go to Panera with me. And it still makes her feel as special as she felt, walking through those doors, head high, smile on her face, and joy in her heart. And maybe, someone else who goes to Panera on the same days we do will watch her grow up the way I've watched this other baby, and it will bring the same blessing it's brought me.

1 comment:

siteseer said...

Wow!! is that thought provoking!! It's great that you overcame your "me" time to share it with your daughter. I'm a little older and I still want me time as now I have to share so much with my retired husband. This weekend my daughter and I are sharing the whole weekend with a weekend crop. I'm really looking forward to it.