What's really important

Right after I posted on Friday, my husband called and said I needed to call my dad-it was important. Which had me scared, because my dad has never called and left that message. So I called him. It turns out my grandma is in the hospital. I called her, and we talked for a while. Mostly, I apologized for not being in better touch. I love her so much, but in the busyness of life, I get caught up and forget.

It was funny, though, because she asked me if I was happy. And I told her yes, I have a good life, a good husband, a beautiful family. But she said, no, that wasn't what I asked. I want to know if you're happy. Because that is all that is important to me. I'm an old woman, the remaining hopes and dreams I have are for my family. That they'll be happy.

It touched me on so many levels. When I talked to my dad, he said that when she gets out of the hospital and is safe to travel, he's flying her to see him. I told him that I want to come too. It's funny, I keep saying I want to go visit her, but then I think about the expense: airfare for everyone, hotel, car rental, and I decide we can't afford it. And then I was reminded of the fact that I spend hundreds of dollars on writing conferences.

Do I really value my grandma? As much as I value my writing? I keep saying that I'm doing it for her, because she's the one who always encouraged me with books. But will my selling a book matter to her if she's stone cold in the grave without knowing how much I love her? So I made the commitment to hubby: as soon as Dad gets her out to see him, we're going out there.

Take the time to look at the things you say are important to you-do your actions, and where you spend your money, reflect it?