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Thursday, July 26, 2007

Thursday Thirteen # 13: Danica's tips for a happy marriage

ThirteenTips for a happy marriage- Danica style!

1. The wife is always right.
2. Every morning is a gift of life to the husband, as the wife may kill him at any time.
3. The husband makes the money, the wife spends the money.
4. When the husband is angry with the wife, he should recall with gratitude that he woke up to a new day.
5. If the wife ain't happy, ain't no one happy.
6. Major discussions should always occur in the kitchen, where the wife has easy access to her butcher knives and sharpening thingy.
7. The proper way of addressing the wife is: Imperial Queen Highness.
8. Fear is a beautiful thing. Nothing keeps a man by a woman's side better than knowing that if he moves, he's dead.
9. Humor is an important glue to keep things together, especially when the gun backfires.
10. Life insurance is a beautiful thing.
11. Gas runs cars, but ruins marriages.
12. The husband should plan his funeral well in advance, as it may be sooner than he thinks.
13. When the wife gets that wild-eyed crazy look, RUN!

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The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!


Anonymous said...

Cute list, but would it be equally as funny if it were a series of jokes about men threatening women, killing them at any time, keeping her in fear all the time etc? There would be women screaming 'abuse' the moment this post appeared. Something of a double standard here.

Jana said...

ROFLOL Too funny, Dream! Toooo funny.

Nicholas~Chill out. It's just a joke. If you knew Dream you'd get it.

Marina said...

Funny list, if only because it isn't serious :D

Anonymous said...

#13 is something my husband knows all too well. :)

tommie said...

cute list.....

Danica Favorite said...

Nicholas, sorry this post offended you. If it helps any, my husband reads my blog every day, and he thought it was funny.

Jana, glad you enjoyed! Thanks!

Marina, definitely. :)

Aithne, That one is definitely serious, LOL. I think every man fears that look. :)

Thanks Tommiea!

Anonymous said...

Well done! I agree with every one of them (and enjoyed laughing through the list).

Heather Diane Tipton said...

LOL You really did blog it!

Cheryl Wyatt said...


Anonymous said...

Hi Danica - I cruised in here from the TT site, because your name is Danica and you're a writer. My name is Danika and I'm a writer. I guess I still get surprised when I see our name out there.

I love that your last name is Favorite!

Humour is in the eye of the beholder. I chuckled. I think I'll mention #2 to my husband.