The past few days, I've realized that I'm just angry. No particular reason, just angry. Maybe it's all the high fructose corn syrup I've cut out of my diet. A couple days ago, I screamed at my kids like a total shrew. And in the middle of it, I realized, I have absolutely no reason to be so angry at them. I apologized, shut my big fat mouth, and curled up on the couch with a blanket.
So today, I sat down at WFTJ, and my friend Robbie starts talking about how I've been on her mind lately, blah blah blah (actually, it was quite sweet, and I'll start crying if I talk about it, so we are NOT going there). And then she says something interesting about how I've grown. That when she first met me, she sensed a lot of repressed anger and frustration, but now she sees a lot of joy and peace in me.
Apparently, she wasn't in the house the other day when I screamed at my kids or last night when I yelled at the hubby and hung up on him. Yeah. Real proud moments.
We start talking and another friend comes up and says, "you're angry? Why are you so angry?" Which of course, leads to me tirading about the most idiotic things in the world that are absolutely no big deal and I have no real reason to be angry about them except that well, I'm just angry.
So I keep asking myself, why am I so angry? And where is this joy that my friend Robbie sees in me? (Robbie, by the way, is the ultimate in living joyfully. You should check out her blog, Joy Dance, and see what I mean.)
I did my thing, went to church, blah blah blah. Not really, but the full church topic has to be saved for another blog. Anyway, we were worshipping, and some of the things I'm angry about starting coming out. Things I'm holding in. Things I don't want to share because the things I'm angry about are selfish things and I don't want to be selfish. Things that hurt way deep down but I'm afraid to talk about them. No, that's not true. I've talked about them. I feel like I've talked about them ad nauseum for three years and nothing's changed. It still hurts. And honestly, I have to think that to some extent, people are sick of hearing it. So I shut it all up inside and don't talk about it any more. And there I am, crying my eyes out in the middle of church, trying to hide it because I know that if hubby sees, he'll want to know what's wrong and that'll just start another issue, and I'm tired of having issues.
And then it hit me... everything I've done today, everything I've heard, talked about, it all boils down to letting God handle my burdens. He does not care if I come crying to him a hundred times a day about all this stuff in my heart. He's not going to think I'm a bad person, a bad wife, a bad mother, a bad whatever it is I've decided I am. He's not going to send me to the corner reserved for the naughty little girls who still cannot get their act together.
One of the verses we talked about in WFTJ was Matthew 11:28-30 "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."
Oh, how my soul needs rest. I am carrying so many burdens. And I'm doing it alone. Because I have some warped thought in my head that it has to be that way.
Tonight in church, Dave talked about grace. And while it wasn't specifically tonight's topic (though I suspect it will be another night), I realized the person I most need to give grace to is myself. To know that even if I unload all the burdens I carry around on His shoulders, it's not going to make me any less in God's eyes. Dave gave the great analogy of a scale, and that our way into heaven isn't dependent on the scale. In my head, I know this to be true... the ticket to heaven is grace. And yet, I am so wrapped up in my perfectionism and hating these human desires that I'm not laying it at the cross. It makes me wonder... have I really accepted grace? Or am I still stuck in some Pharisaical rut of believing lies and trying to perform my way into heaven?
The reality of who I am is that I'm a mess. I'm trying to clean it up, really I am. But it's pretty stupid to think that a mess is going to clean itself up. I've got kids. I should know better. But that's been my expectation. I'm angry because I'm not perfect. I'm angry because all the perfect things I planned for my life aren't happening in the perfect order I planned for them. I'm angry because I rely way too much on me and not enough on God. Nothing I do is going to cure this anger until I can step away and fully accept grace.
Tuesday, June 03, 2008
Monday, June 02, 2008
Communication Frustration
Communication has not been working for me. I'm a writer. I teach. I've been trained in public speaking. I get paid to chat with folks on the web. This should all translate to: Danica knows how to communicate, right?
Apparently not. Either that, or I can't seem to run into the folks who do.
Issue #1: Not telling me what you want. Especially if I give you the opportunity to do so. When I say, "what do you want," and you either say nothing or don't respond, why am I the bad guy for not giving you what you want? And yet, I've had several people be absolutely nasty to me over the past few days for that exact thing. I can't read minds, so why is it MY problem that you have a problem?
Issue #2: Going back on what you previously told me. This is really getting to be a hot button with me. If you say, "do this," and I do, don't be mad at me later for doing it. I have several new orifices after being torn into for doing exactly what I was told to do.
Issue #3: Not saying what you mean. Years ago, a Christian comedian did a routine about how when a person said, "bless his/her heart," they were really saying "you big idiot." That drives me nuts. If you mean the person is an idiot, then just say so. I'll respect you a lot more.
So there it is... my frustration with communication as of late. Please feel free to share your own frustrations. And do try, when communicating with me, to be clear and avoid making the mistakes above. It'll save all of us a big headache.
Apparently not. Either that, or I can't seem to run into the folks who do.
Issue #1: Not telling me what you want. Especially if I give you the opportunity to do so. When I say, "what do you want," and you either say nothing or don't respond, why am I the bad guy for not giving you what you want? And yet, I've had several people be absolutely nasty to me over the past few days for that exact thing. I can't read minds, so why is it MY problem that you have a problem?
Issue #2: Going back on what you previously told me. This is really getting to be a hot button with me. If you say, "do this," and I do, don't be mad at me later for doing it. I have several new orifices after being torn into for doing exactly what I was told to do.
Issue #3: Not saying what you mean. Years ago, a Christian comedian did a routine about how when a person said, "bless his/her heart," they were really saying "you big idiot." That drives me nuts. If you mean the person is an idiot, then just say so. I'll respect you a lot more.
So there it is... my frustration with communication as of late. Please feel free to share your own frustrations. And do try, when communicating with me, to be clear and avoid making the mistakes above. It'll save all of us a big headache.
Saturday, May 31, 2008
The Country Mouse Citified
I grew up in a small town. So small, that until a couple years ago, you couldn’t call my grandma and tell her something private because one of the neighbors on the party line was always listening. I was the stereotypical “I can’t wait to get out of this town” person. I left for college and never looked back. I return for the occasional family visit, but mostly, I’m content to remain near the city, where Dairy Queen, Starbucks and Safeway are all a short walk away.
Today, as I headed down the freeway, enjoying the feeling of breezing past the other cars, I saw an old pickup truck with some unusual features. “How quaint,” I thought, admiring how cute they’d done up their truck. Perfectly country, and definitely something out of Hicksville. As I continued to exclaim over how adorable this out of place pickup was, I realized something.
We had that kind of truck growing up.
I probably won’t admit this story to my family, since they all think I’ve grown way too big for my britches and turned into some kind of city snob. And maybe I have. But it’s interesting to know that as much as you’ve taken the mouse out of the country and firmly implanted her in the city, there are some country things you just can’t take away.
Today, as I headed down the freeway, enjoying the feeling of breezing past the other cars, I saw an old pickup truck with some unusual features. “How quaint,” I thought, admiring how cute they’d done up their truck. Perfectly country, and definitely something out of Hicksville. As I continued to exclaim over how adorable this out of place pickup was, I realized something.
We had that kind of truck growing up.
I probably won’t admit this story to my family, since they all think I’ve grown way too big for my britches and turned into some kind of city snob. And maybe I have. But it’s interesting to know that as much as you’ve taken the mouse out of the country and firmly implanted her in the city, there are some country things you just can’t take away.
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Thursday Thirteen #47: Where did the week go?
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I have to say, I hate long weekends. I have a hard enough time keeping track of days as it is, so when folks mess it up by throwing a holiday in there, I get really confused. Which leaves me wondering... where did the week go? 1. I flounder without a "normal" schedule. The little one had her last day of preschool last week, so I'm having a hard time focusing without that schedule to remind me of what day it is. 2. Having hubby home on Monday made me think it was Sunday so I've been a day behind all week. 3. For some reason, I keep thinking we have one more week in May... 4. I remembered a birthday party just before we had to be there, so the little one didn't miss it! 5. I managed to double book us for a picnic and a girl scout event. 6. I did make it to Sharen's last day at WFTJ, but because I thought we had another week, I forgot her gift. 7. The school isn't serving hot lunch tomorrow, so I REALLY have to remember it IS Friday, the last day of school, and I have to pack her a lunch. 8. I did get all of our bills paid. I think. Now I have to remember to mail them... 9. I also got some books ordered that I've been meaning to order for a while. 10. I am working on a plan for the summer to keep us all on track (and on schedule!). 11. I did get in to work and finished another project I've been working on. 12. I went grocery shopping and stocked the kitchen. 13. And YES!! I did finish the newest Packrat set. :) So before you all comment and tell me to look up Flylady, let's just be clear here. Flylady is not my thing. I'll be fine once we figure out a new schedule. Until the next holiday or change hits. :) |
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others' comments. It’s easy, and fun! Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!
View More Thursday Thirteen Participants
Sunday, May 25, 2008
Progress reports, please!
So here we are at the end of the challenge.
My goal was 5,000 words and some revisiony stuff. I ended at 5,120 AND made the revisions that I know of AND sent them off for another pair of eyes. We will not discuss WHAT I wrote, because it was completely not what I was supposed to write, but really, what am I supposed to be writing right now? I'm REVISING. So I can SUBMIT.
What about all of you, my faithful friends? Did you make your goal? What did you do towards your goal?
My goal was 5,000 words and some revisiony stuff. I ended at 5,120 AND made the revisions that I know of AND sent them off for another pair of eyes. We will not discuss WHAT I wrote, because it was completely not what I was supposed to write, but really, what am I supposed to be writing right now? I'm REVISING. So I can SUBMIT.
What about all of you, my faithful friends? Did you make your goal? What did you do towards your goal?
Saturday, May 24, 2008
Why I'm not looking forward to puberty.
A conversation in the car last night:
K: Mom, what color are my lips?
Me: (driving, trying to figure out what I still had to do with the remainder of the evening). Uh, red?
K: But I want them to be pink!
Me: Well, honey, I'm driving, so I can't see your lips. Lips are kind of a pinkish red, so maybe your lips are pink.
K: But you said they were red.
Me: (noting to self that I need a crystal ball to figure out what kiddo wants, and that I should have also actually looked at kiddo's lips before answering the question) When we get there, I'll look at your lips and tell you what color they are.
K: (tearfully wailing) My lips aren't pink!
Me: Honey, your lips are perfect. (Stopping at a light so I can turn and look) Yup, they're more pink than red. Your lips are beautiful.
K: But I want pink lips! (still sobbing)
We drive to our destination, and she spends the ENTIRE TIME crying because she wants pink lips. We head back home, and she's still sobbing and obsessing about needing pink lips.
Me: (Exasperated) Honey, I really think I was wrong in saying your lips are red. I think they're really pink.
K: (sniffing) You think so?
Me: Yes. (Because really, what color ARE lips? Pink? Red? Aren't they just the same shade with a little white thrown in? I'm a writer, not an artist)
K: (FINALLY ceasing the tears, but with a wavering voice) I'll go home and check to see if my lips are pink. I've just GOT to have pink lips.
She has since decided that her lips are definitely red. And she's extremely depressed that her lips are not pink. If you mention her lips, she starts crying.
Isn't this hormonal girly stuff supposed to happen when she's 14, not 4? If this is a taste of things to come, we are really in trouble. I joke about sending them to boarding school for the teen years, but seriously... how am I going to survive this?
K: Mom, what color are my lips?
Me: (driving, trying to figure out what I still had to do with the remainder of the evening). Uh, red?
K: But I want them to be pink!
Me: Well, honey, I'm driving, so I can't see your lips. Lips are kind of a pinkish red, so maybe your lips are pink.
K: But you said they were red.
Me: (noting to self that I need a crystal ball to figure out what kiddo wants, and that I should have also actually looked at kiddo's lips before answering the question) When we get there, I'll look at your lips and tell you what color they are.
K: (tearfully wailing) My lips aren't pink!
Me: Honey, your lips are perfect. (Stopping at a light so I can turn and look) Yup, they're more pink than red. Your lips are beautiful.
K: But I want pink lips! (still sobbing)
We drive to our destination, and she spends the ENTIRE TIME crying because she wants pink lips. We head back home, and she's still sobbing and obsessing about needing pink lips.
Me: (Exasperated) Honey, I really think I was wrong in saying your lips are red. I think they're really pink.
K: (sniffing) You think so?
Me: Yes. (Because really, what color ARE lips? Pink? Red? Aren't they just the same shade with a little white thrown in? I'm a writer, not an artist)
K: (FINALLY ceasing the tears, but with a wavering voice) I'll go home and check to see if my lips are pink. I've just GOT to have pink lips.
She has since decided that her lips are definitely red. And she's extremely depressed that her lips are not pink. If you mention her lips, she starts crying.
Isn't this hormonal girly stuff supposed to happen when she's 14, not 4? If this is a taste of things to come, we are really in trouble. I joke about sending them to boarding school for the teen years, but seriously... how am I going to survive this?
Thursday, May 22, 2008
Thursday Thirteen #46: Mid Challenge Checkup
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1. I finished the Dark Roast set in Packrat. (HEY! That's important) 2. I've spent a great deal of time staring at the crack in my family room ceiling wondering how and why it got there, and whether or not anything will come crashing down on me as I write. (That's a legitimate fear... if the ceiling crashes down on my laptop, I'll lose everything.) 3. I'm at about 25% of my writing goal for the week with 3 days to go. And still confident I will make it. 4. I folded five or six loads of laundry. 5. I have all the current Packrat cards vaulted. (Talented, that's me.) 6. I am caught up on almost all of my online work, except for the coding stuff I can't figure out. (oh brother-poo... call me!) 7. I spent a day in Boulder researching setting. 8. I stopped by a lovely ice cream fountain in Golden, which will appear in one of my books. See, eating ice cream IS research! 9. I think I changed some of the backstory for my hero. Maybe. Dare I? How many times can I change it before I'm satisfied? 10. I emailed a few folks about the edits I need to do. 11. I even built a couple of Packrat sets for some friends. (And see, I'm generous, too.) 12. I've done everything on the to-do list except pay bills. Ugh. I'd much rather write than know how poor I really am. 13. Even though the words are not yet on the page (because really, how boring would that be?), I've done a lot more plotting and figuring of things I hadn't quite figured on stuff that needed to be figured. As soon as I get the edits on Book #1 done, I'll be able to breeze through a few changes I need to make to #2, and then I can finish writing #3. Is it sad that I'm excited about #3 even though I haven't sold #1 yet? Sheesh. I need to get a life. Or play more Packrat. ;) |
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others' comments. It’s easy, and fun! Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!
View More Thursday Thirteen Participants
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
So the point of a challenge is...
TO DO IT!!!
Here's the funny thing. I've chatted with a few folks who said they read my blog. A couple said, oh yeah, I want to do that challenge thing.
So do it already! Post your goal. What are you going to accomplish between now and Sunday night?
Me, I'm going to send those lovely chapters to a fresh set of eyes to do some tweaking. While I wait, I'm going to write 5,000 words on book 3.
That's my goal. Meeting it will be something of a miracle given that hubby so graciously filled my Panera time with some repair dude, I have a research field trip planned with my friend Karen, kiddo has a school program, I still have my normal work to do, I'm supposed to pay bills, my house is a DISASTER, and hubby will be working insane hours. And for some reason, my family is still under the impression it's my job to feed them. I know, rough life.
Believe it or not, my list of things to do is not a complaint. Maybe just a small whine because I have a really bad headache. My point is this: we all have challenges. Some of you have bigger lists than I do. That's fine. Maybe it'll be all you can do to fire up the old computer and tap out a few lines. Then do that. Make yourself do something. Push yourself a little more to do more than you thought you could.
That's the only way to meet your goals.
Post them, and then go DO it!
Here's the funny thing. I've chatted with a few folks who said they read my blog. A couple said, oh yeah, I want to do that challenge thing.
So do it already! Post your goal. What are you going to accomplish between now and Sunday night?
Me, I'm going to send those lovely chapters to a fresh set of eyes to do some tweaking. While I wait, I'm going to write 5,000 words on book 3.
That's my goal. Meeting it will be something of a miracle given that hubby so graciously filled my Panera time with some repair dude, I have a research field trip planned with my friend Karen, kiddo has a school program, I still have my normal work to do, I'm supposed to pay bills, my house is a DISASTER, and hubby will be working insane hours. And for some reason, my family is still under the impression it's my job to feed them. I know, rough life.
Believe it or not, my list of things to do is not a complaint. Maybe just a small whine because I have a really bad headache. My point is this: we all have challenges. Some of you have bigger lists than I do. That's fine. Maybe it'll be all you can do to fire up the old computer and tap out a few lines. Then do that. Make yourself do something. Push yourself a little more to do more than you thought you could.
That's the only way to meet your goals.
Post them, and then go DO it!
Monday, May 19, 2008
Writing Challenge!!
It's that time!!!
A couple of weeks ago, I promised a writing challenge. And here it is: This week, we are WRITING. No excuses. I want goals, my friends, GOALS. What are you going to accomplish this week with your writing?
A few of you *nudge nudge* were at a conference this weekend and had some incredible requests. Some of us *kicking myself* were told be an agent that she had some revising to do. And the rest of you just need to get cracking!!
So here it is:
Post your goal in the comments section (unless you already did so in the previous post).
Sunday night, post what you did.
I will then do my math magic (be afraid) and figure out who met their goal by the highest percentage. That person wins either 1000 crackrat credits OR a $10 giftcard to the bookstore or java joint of their choice.
EVERYONE who meets their goals will be listed on the winner's list AND, if you meet your goals every month through August, you'll be eligible for a special grand prize. For Colorado folks, that spells par-tay at Dreamy's house. For ACFW folks, that means par-tay at ACFW. For everyone else, I'll do something creative.
Are you still reading? You shouldn't be. You should be posting a goal, then getting your behind in the chair and writing away. :)
A couple of weeks ago, I promised a writing challenge. And here it is: This week, we are WRITING. No excuses. I want goals, my friends, GOALS. What are you going to accomplish this week with your writing?
A few of you *nudge nudge* were at a conference this weekend and had some incredible requests. Some of us *kicking myself* were told be an agent that she had some revising to do. And the rest of you just need to get cracking!!
So here it is:
Post your goal in the comments section (unless you already did so in the previous post).
Sunday night, post what you did.
I will then do my math magic (be afraid) and figure out who met their goal by the highest percentage. That person wins either 1000 crackrat credits OR a $10 giftcard to the bookstore or java joint of their choice.
EVERYONE who meets their goals will be listed on the winner's list AND, if you meet your goals every month through August, you'll be eligible for a special grand prize. For Colorado folks, that spells par-tay at Dreamy's house. For ACFW folks, that means par-tay at ACFW. For everyone else, I'll do something creative.
Are you still reading? You shouldn't be. You should be posting a goal, then getting your behind in the chair and writing away. :)
Sunday, May 18, 2008
How long do we avoid?
Yes, I've been playing Packrat again. Still. And I have everything vaulted that's available to be vaulted and I'm not so patiently waiting for the rest.
But that's not what I'm blogging about.
This morning, I was forced to face the reality that I am still not exercising enough.
Have you ever taken a sausage out of its casing, then tried to stuff it back in? Well, that's what I felt like today, putting on my capris for the first time this season. And I thought, they fit last year, they're GONNA fit this year.
Now, I have a lower tolerance for tight clothing, so I do tend to wear things baggy. But let me tell you... wearing those pants nearly killed me. I don't know how the people I see walking around in their tight pants do it, because I honestly thought I was going to die. I couldn't breathe. My parts were smooshed into parts they shouldn't have been smooshed into, and everything was rearranged to fit into places I'm not sure God meant for them to be.
Fashion is just not my thing.
I realize now that I'm faced with a choice. Spend the rest of the summer wearing sweats and old soccer shorts or finally break down and get back in shape. Considering I did agree to climb a 14,000 foot mountain this summer, I'm guessing it's going to be the one I'm avoiding. Wait. I'm avoiding both things, because I also hate wearing sweats. But you see where I'm going with this, right?
Some of you dear people who know and love me are saying, but Danica, you look great. You're fine just as you are. While I agree with you in theory, you did not have to wear those pants today. And no, they didn't shrink in the wash. Unless it happened to my entire summer wardrobe.
I have to ask myself, though, why does it take a crisis, like realizing none of your summer pants fit, to finally accept that you need to be doing what you already knew you should be doing, but kept putting off? The truth is, I hate exercise. I stink at pretty much every sport. Have you seen the TV shows that have the stereotypical kid that's always the last to be picked? They patterned the kid off of me. How I married a former pro soccer player, I have no idea. Further proof that God has a sense of humor.
Do you see all the excuses I continue to make? I could go on about the lack of time, lack of energy, blah blah blah. But in the end, it brings me no closer to climbing that mountain or fitting into my pants. So this week, I'm going to go out, walk around the block, catch up on my yoga show, and take that tiny step out of avoidance and into victory?
Anyone want to join me?
But that's not what I'm blogging about.
This morning, I was forced to face the reality that I am still not exercising enough.
Have you ever taken a sausage out of its casing, then tried to stuff it back in? Well, that's what I felt like today, putting on my capris for the first time this season. And I thought, they fit last year, they're GONNA fit this year.
Now, I have a lower tolerance for tight clothing, so I do tend to wear things baggy. But let me tell you... wearing those pants nearly killed me. I don't know how the people I see walking around in their tight pants do it, because I honestly thought I was going to die. I couldn't breathe. My parts were smooshed into parts they shouldn't have been smooshed into, and everything was rearranged to fit into places I'm not sure God meant for them to be.
Fashion is just not my thing.
I realize now that I'm faced with a choice. Spend the rest of the summer wearing sweats and old soccer shorts or finally break down and get back in shape. Considering I did agree to climb a 14,000 foot mountain this summer, I'm guessing it's going to be the one I'm avoiding. Wait. I'm avoiding both things, because I also hate wearing sweats. But you see where I'm going with this, right?
Some of you dear people who know and love me are saying, but Danica, you look great. You're fine just as you are. While I agree with you in theory, you did not have to wear those pants today. And no, they didn't shrink in the wash. Unless it happened to my entire summer wardrobe.
I have to ask myself, though, why does it take a crisis, like realizing none of your summer pants fit, to finally accept that you need to be doing what you already knew you should be doing, but kept putting off? The truth is, I hate exercise. I stink at pretty much every sport. Have you seen the TV shows that have the stereotypical kid that's always the last to be picked? They patterned the kid off of me. How I married a former pro soccer player, I have no idea. Further proof that God has a sense of humor.
Do you see all the excuses I continue to make? I could go on about the lack of time, lack of energy, blah blah blah. But in the end, it brings me no closer to climbing that mountain or fitting into my pants. So this week, I'm going to go out, walk around the block, catch up on my yoga show, and take that tiny step out of avoidance and into victory?
Anyone want to join me?
Thursday, May 15, 2008
Who I am.
Every so often, I come to realize that I'm repeating the same patterns that I think are bad, but I'm not sure how I get into them or why I'm doing it, or how on earth I ended up here. Maybe I'm the only one who does this, so maybe this won't make sense, but here goes. Have you ever finished a project, time period, etc. and said, "next time, I'll do it differently. I'll do it better," only to find out at the end of that next time, you've ended up in the exact place you thought you'd do differently?
And that, my friends, is where I am today.
So frankly, I'm depressed. I managed to hold myself together, attend a group I belong to, go in to work to take care of one client, do some shopping, and head home. I fully intended to do the thing I always do when I'm depressed, didn't get enough sleep, and don't have the energy to focus on anything but how much it stinks to be where I'm at right now. But then, I opened my email, and found one from a friend that had me laughing so hard, I was crying.
I realized something very important from this silly little email. And trust me, it was silly. But that's why I love this person. My friend believes in me. But more important than that, this person "gets" me enough to send me silly messages to convey that message in a way I understand far better than people's platitudes about how great I am. (And frankly, when I'm in this particular mood, such platitudes make me mad because I think I'm being lied to, as irrational as that sounds.)
Much of my depression today was about this whole question of where I belong. I've always been "the weird one." To be honest, I've never known where I fit in this whole scheme of life. As I've gone deeper into the writing journey, God's made it really clear that being a writer... that's where I "fit."
Over the past couple of months, I've been asked to give up some things to help fulfill this whole "purpose as a writer thing." Still not able to share it all publicly, so again, bear with me. It's hard to give up things that have been a part of your life for so long. It's hard to say no to things that actually make me feel like a normal human being. It's hard to give up on things I think will finally define me as just a regular gal. Those are the things I've wanted my whole life, and even though in some ways, I find a lot of satisfaction in them, they make me miserable.
I am not normal.
For me, normal is abnormal to the rest of the world. And even though I can recite the Bible verses about not being of this world until I'm blue in the face, I still struggle with my frustrations of not being normal. I wonder why I can't walk into a room and be like everyone else. So I struggle, trying to be the person God made me, and yet trying to walk this tightrope of trying to fit into a world where I don't belong.
It's exhausting.
And I think that's why God has asked me to walk away from some of those things. He knows it's not good for me. He didn't make me to be some kind of mime walking the streets in an imitation of life. If that's what He'd wanted, that's what He'd have made. Instead, He made ME.
I am wacky. I am crazy. I am silly. I am creative. I am an artist. I paint beautiful pictures with my words. I do not understand the way the "normal" world works, even though I fake it real well. And sometimes, like today, when I am forced to face all the things I'm doing wrong because they have absolutely nothing to do with my writing, it all comes crashing down and I want to hide in my hole for a few weeks.
But see, today... today I did things differently. I did not go take a nap. I cleaned my house. I let the kiddos drag the neighborhood kiddos over to play. I made a nice dinner. I let That Man take me shopping for a new camera, even though I really wanted to go to the mothership, BN. I finished my work. I ate a bowl of ice cream. And then...
I wrote.
Because see, God made me for some important things. I don't know what they are. It could be writing the Great American Novel that finally made everyone open their eyes to the truth. Or it could be raising the glittery princess who finally manages to blow up the world. Or it could be raising the cowgirl whose love of animals mimics the love of Christ. I don't know. But I've got to do my best to remember the path God put me on. And to follow it wherever it leads.
I find comfort knowing that these struggles are not in vain. I know that some of the folks reading my blog deal with the same issues. You guys are such an encouragement to me because I am reminded that I do fit. I belong right where God put me. Which is where each of you belong. If you're the creative artist type, it's okay. Be weird. Encourage your wacky friends. Send them emails about having your photos taken at a wild screaming match at Sean Penn's wild Arbor Day party. Rip your heart out and expose it to the world, offering it up as a sacrifice to the Lord. Do whatever silly (or normal... if that's your gig) thing you're supposed to do because God made you that way.
Finally, because I couldn't find a good place to slip it in unnoticed (but maybe it's supposed to stand out), I encourage any artist types who are struggling with their artist identity to read my friend Heather's blog. She's got some incredible posts that encourage and inspire me in my journey.
Maybe this time, as I try to figure out how to do things differently, I'll remember that the best answer may be to just not do it at all and to trust God.
And that, my friends, is where I am today.
So frankly, I'm depressed. I managed to hold myself together, attend a group I belong to, go in to work to take care of one client, do some shopping, and head home. I fully intended to do the thing I always do when I'm depressed, didn't get enough sleep, and don't have the energy to focus on anything but how much it stinks to be where I'm at right now. But then, I opened my email, and found one from a friend that had me laughing so hard, I was crying.
I realized something very important from this silly little email. And trust me, it was silly. But that's why I love this person. My friend believes in me. But more important than that, this person "gets" me enough to send me silly messages to convey that message in a way I understand far better than people's platitudes about how great I am. (And frankly, when I'm in this particular mood, such platitudes make me mad because I think I'm being lied to, as irrational as that sounds.)
Much of my depression today was about this whole question of where I belong. I've always been "the weird one." To be honest, I've never known where I fit in this whole scheme of life. As I've gone deeper into the writing journey, God's made it really clear that being a writer... that's where I "fit."
Over the past couple of months, I've been asked to give up some things to help fulfill this whole "purpose as a writer thing." Still not able to share it all publicly, so again, bear with me. It's hard to give up things that have been a part of your life for so long. It's hard to say no to things that actually make me feel like a normal human being. It's hard to give up on things I think will finally define me as just a regular gal. Those are the things I've wanted my whole life, and even though in some ways, I find a lot of satisfaction in them, they make me miserable.
I am not normal.
For me, normal is abnormal to the rest of the world. And even though I can recite the Bible verses about not being of this world until I'm blue in the face, I still struggle with my frustrations of not being normal. I wonder why I can't walk into a room and be like everyone else. So I struggle, trying to be the person God made me, and yet trying to walk this tightrope of trying to fit into a world where I don't belong.
It's exhausting.
And I think that's why God has asked me to walk away from some of those things. He knows it's not good for me. He didn't make me to be some kind of mime walking the streets in an imitation of life. If that's what He'd wanted, that's what He'd have made. Instead, He made ME.
I am wacky. I am crazy. I am silly. I am creative. I am an artist. I paint beautiful pictures with my words. I do not understand the way the "normal" world works, even though I fake it real well. And sometimes, like today, when I am forced to face all the things I'm doing wrong because they have absolutely nothing to do with my writing, it all comes crashing down and I want to hide in my hole for a few weeks.
But see, today... today I did things differently. I did not go take a nap. I cleaned my house. I let the kiddos drag the neighborhood kiddos over to play. I made a nice dinner. I let That Man take me shopping for a new camera, even though I really wanted to go to the mothership, BN. I finished my work. I ate a bowl of ice cream. And then...
I wrote.
Because see, God made me for some important things. I don't know what they are. It could be writing the Great American Novel that finally made everyone open their eyes to the truth. Or it could be raising the glittery princess who finally manages to blow up the world. Or it could be raising the cowgirl whose love of animals mimics the love of Christ. I don't know. But I've got to do my best to remember the path God put me on. And to follow it wherever it leads.
I find comfort knowing that these struggles are not in vain. I know that some of the folks reading my blog deal with the same issues. You guys are such an encouragement to me because I am reminded that I do fit. I belong right where God put me. Which is where each of you belong. If you're the creative artist type, it's okay. Be weird. Encourage your wacky friends. Send them emails about having your photos taken at a wild screaming match at Sean Penn's wild Arbor Day party. Rip your heart out and expose it to the world, offering it up as a sacrifice to the Lord. Do whatever silly (or normal... if that's your gig) thing you're supposed to do because God made you that way.
Finally, because I couldn't find a good place to slip it in unnoticed (but maybe it's supposed to stand out), I encourage any artist types who are struggling with their artist identity to read my friend Heather's blog. She's got some incredible posts that encourage and inspire me in my journey.
Maybe this time, as I try to figure out how to do things differently, I'll remember that the best answer may be to just not do it at all and to trust God.
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
Thursday Thirteen #45: High Fructose Corn Syrup
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Ever since I watched a program on the Discovery Channel or someplace similar about High Fructose Corn Syrup, I've become uber paranoid about the stuff. It's SO bad for you. As I've tried helping my family eat healthier, I've realized that this stuff is just as bad as, if not worse (and I vote for worse) than the whole trans-fat deal. When will we learn to stop messing with our food? Oh. Right. Not supposed to rant. Must. List. 1. HFCS is made using fungus, fermentation, and chemicals in conjunction with corn. Doesn't that just sound yummy? 2. HFCS has been shown to speed up disease and disrupt the body's natural processes in lab tests with rats. 3. I have a hard time finding pickles made without HFCS... oddly enough, when I used to can with my grandma, we never put HFCS in them. 4. The manufacture of HFCS increases pollution and uses more energy than natural sweeteners. 5. HFCS is entirely man-made. There is nothing natural about it. 6. I was eating KFC tonight (yes, I know, bad health choice) and on the label for the HONEY, the primary ingredient was HFCS. What's wrong with regular honey? 7. Preliminary evidence links HFCS to cancer. 8. HFCS affects hormonal production. 9. Dr. Pepper made with sugar tastes better than Dr. Pepper made with HFCS, but is only available from certain distributors (mostly in Texas). 10. HFCS is cheaper than sugar. (But is it worth it?) 11. This is not an all-inclusive list, but here's a link to a list of foods with HFCS. 12. Have you seen the Juicy Juice commercial where they show the parents giving their kids a glop of HFCS? That glop is in a lot of what we eat and drink. 13. Many natural food markets will not carry products with HFCS, but some do have it, so it's important to read the labels. A list wasn't as satisfying as a vent, so I think I'll vent about it again one of these days. |
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others' comments. It’s easy, and fun! Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!
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Sunday, May 11, 2008
The name game
I know, you all will have a heart attack and die. Two posts in one night. It's because Packrat hasn't released anything new lately and I've completed all the sets I can. So, my choices of activity are: watch the Jericho DVDs hubby got me for M-Day (blech... I'd have to go to the other TV), clean up from party (you'd think they'd have done that for me, it being M-Day and all), write (I am WAITING to hear back on my revisions, so there), or mess around on the computer.
ANYWAY... Jaen's response to my last post had me posting this as a really long response, and then I decided just to do it as a blog.
I called my daughter Kiki in my last post. Let's be clear here. I'm the only one allowed to call her Kiki, and she barely tolerates that. The people at church call her Kiki, but I'm semi-convinced they think Kiki is actually her name. Which is kinda funny, because she won't answer to it. So they all sit there, saying, "hey, Kiki," and she ignores them. Sorry. I probably shouldn't find that funny, but I do. I should probably talk to her about manners, but I'm always too busy laughing. Did I mention she's a Diva? And don't you think Kiki is a Diva name? Oh, to go back and change her birth certificate... (Kidding, honey, I promise)
The funny thing about Kiki and her friends is that they all have weird names. Veronica is also known as Lolly, and she calls Kiki "Caleb" which is also not her name. She calls Liam "Leo". Then there's The Dog, named Grant, but we call him LiLi. When That Man and I got together, I thought his family was huge. Well, it is, but it's not as big as I thought. Because THEY all have nicknames and so when you hear them talk about all these people, you think they're different people, but they're not.
Which is actually pretty funny that Jaen posted something that made me think of nicknames. In case you're wondering, she posted as JANET. I don't know her as Janet. I know her as Jaen (and how do you say that, anyway?). Which is why I generally go around listing myself as Danica/Dream. No, I'm not schizophrenic. At least I don't think I am. Am I? But different people know me as different names, and I can never remember which name which people know me by.
As I read the previous paragraph, I'm cracking up even more, because some of you are scratching your heads wondering where I got a comment from Janet. It's because I have FOUR blogs. I started one, a long time ago, didn't like the interface, but have no clue how to transfer the posts, so I started double posting. And then, I got a MySpace, and it had a blog and folks wanted to read my blog but they were too lazy to click a link and I'm sooo accommodating, so I just copied my blog on MySpace. And THEN, I found out that some of my good friends who also like to read my blog are on Xanga, so of course, I copy and paste there.
Are you dizzy yet?
Even though I should probably feel guilty that I'm confusing my poor sweet terrorist child by calling her Kiki instead of her real name (which I DO use on occasion, and not just when she's in trouble), she's going to have to get used to it, I fear. Life will give her all sorts of nicknames. At least the one I gave her is cute and loving, right? And if it does scar her for life, well, I suppose there's always therapy. Or she could write a book. ;)
ANYWAY... Jaen's response to my last post had me posting this as a really long response, and then I decided just to do it as a blog.
I called my daughter Kiki in my last post. Let's be clear here. I'm the only one allowed to call her Kiki, and she barely tolerates that. The people at church call her Kiki, but I'm semi-convinced they think Kiki is actually her name. Which is kinda funny, because she won't answer to it. So they all sit there, saying, "hey, Kiki," and she ignores them. Sorry. I probably shouldn't find that funny, but I do. I should probably talk to her about manners, but I'm always too busy laughing. Did I mention she's a Diva? And don't you think Kiki is a Diva name? Oh, to go back and change her birth certificate... (Kidding, honey, I promise)
The funny thing about Kiki and her friends is that they all have weird names. Veronica is also known as Lolly, and she calls Kiki "Caleb" which is also not her name. She calls Liam "Leo". Then there's The Dog, named Grant, but we call him LiLi. When That Man and I got together, I thought his family was huge. Well, it is, but it's not as big as I thought. Because THEY all have nicknames and so when you hear them talk about all these people, you think they're different people, but they're not.
Which is actually pretty funny that Jaen posted something that made me think of nicknames. In case you're wondering, she posted as JANET. I don't know her as Janet. I know her as Jaen (and how do you say that, anyway?). Which is why I generally go around listing myself as Danica/Dream. No, I'm not schizophrenic. At least I don't think I am. Am I? But different people know me as different names, and I can never remember which name which people know me by.
As I read the previous paragraph, I'm cracking up even more, because some of you are scratching your heads wondering where I got a comment from Janet. It's because I have FOUR blogs. I started one, a long time ago, didn't like the interface, but have no clue how to transfer the posts, so I started double posting. And then, I got a MySpace, and it had a blog and folks wanted to read my blog but they were too lazy to click a link and I'm sooo accommodating, so I just copied my blog on MySpace. And THEN, I found out that some of my good friends who also like to read my blog are on Xanga, so of course, I copy and paste there.
Are you dizzy yet?
Even though I should probably feel guilty that I'm confusing my poor sweet terrorist child by calling her Kiki instead of her real name (which I DO use on occasion, and not just when she's in trouble), she's going to have to get used to it, I fear. Life will give her all sorts of nicknames. At least the one I gave her is cute and loving, right? And if it does scar her for life, well, I suppose there's always therapy. Or she could write a book. ;)
Knock-knock Mania
I survived yesterday's trauma of four-year-olds running around my house. Why, oh why, did it have to be cold and windy? One of the lovely activities the children forced me to endure was knock-knock jokes. At this age, one of the important developmental stages is learning to grasp humor. Which, trust me, they do not grasp.
So here are some of the winners...
Kiki: Knock-knock.
Liam: Who's there?
Kiki: Banana.
Liam: Banana Who?
Kiki: Banana I'm going to marry Liam when I grow up.
Followed with her best friend Veronica...
V: Knock-knock
K: Who's there?
V: Banana.
K: Banana who?
V: Banana I'm going to marry Liam too.
Which led to a screech from Liam, who said, "But I'm going to marry Kiki!" Granted, Liam and Kiki have been friends for a couple of years now, and in that time, both have been very firm in their resolve that they will be marrying each other when they grow up. But still... my daughter is FOUR and she's already fighting with her best friend over boys.
Once we clarified that they were too young to decide who was marrying who, we were able to get to such ditties as:
Knock-knock
Who's There?
Carrots
Carrots who?
Carrots on my forehead.
I think we endured about thirty minutes of this... each punchline followed by hysterical laughter. I was so grateful that my best friend was there for the torture. Said friend is mother of Veronica... she and I had some good laughs.
It's really been wonderful sharing this time with her. When she told me she was pregnant with V, I was a bit sad because I'd been trying for so long and it hadn't happened yet. And then it did, just a couple months later. We made so many plans... watched our bellies grow together, told our babies in our bellies that they would be best friends. When the girls turned one, we were sad that they didn't seem to want to play together. Now that they're older, it's such a joy to watch how much they love each other.
So there we were, watching them already fighting over a boy... not a developmental milestone we thought would happen now, but it's still really great to have a mom friend to walk, talk, laugh, and cry through each stage. Even when the stage consists of:
K: Knock knock
V: Who's there?
K: Sandwich.
V: Sandwich who?
K: Sandwich is gonna eat you all up!
Gotta save 'em while I can...
So here are some of the winners...
Kiki: Knock-knock.
Liam: Who's there?
Kiki: Banana.
Liam: Banana Who?
Kiki: Banana I'm going to marry Liam when I grow up.
Followed with her best friend Veronica...
V: Knock-knock
K: Who's there?
V: Banana.
K: Banana who?
V: Banana I'm going to marry Liam too.
Which led to a screech from Liam, who said, "But I'm going to marry Kiki!" Granted, Liam and Kiki have been friends for a couple of years now, and in that time, both have been very firm in their resolve that they will be marrying each other when they grow up. But still... my daughter is FOUR and she's already fighting with her best friend over boys.
Once we clarified that they were too young to decide who was marrying who, we were able to get to such ditties as:
Knock-knock
Who's There?
Carrots
Carrots who?
Carrots on my forehead.
I think we endured about thirty minutes of this... each punchline followed by hysterical laughter. I was so grateful that my best friend was there for the torture. Said friend is mother of Veronica... she and I had some good laughs.
It's really been wonderful sharing this time with her. When she told me she was pregnant with V, I was a bit sad because I'd been trying for so long and it hadn't happened yet. And then it did, just a couple months later. We made so many plans... watched our bellies grow together, told our babies in our bellies that they would be best friends. When the girls turned one, we were sad that they didn't seem to want to play together. Now that they're older, it's such a joy to watch how much they love each other.
So there we were, watching them already fighting over a boy... not a developmental milestone we thought would happen now, but it's still really great to have a mom friend to walk, talk, laugh, and cry through each stage. Even when the stage consists of:
K: Knock knock
V: Who's there?
K: Sandwich.
V: Sandwich who?
K: Sandwich is gonna eat you all up!
Gotta save 'em while I can...
Saturday, May 10, 2008
A sweet little ditty...
As we know from my pre-Mother's Day blog, the small one turns four on Monday. Someone else near and dear to our hearts will be turning fifty the day before. Yes, my friends, some of whom may have already entered, Chip MacGregor is holding his annual really bad poetry contest. Last year, I did not win with my epic ode, which is good, since it means I'm not bad. This year, I'm playing it short and sweet.
Oh the pressure!!
I sit on my couch trying to think of something witty
A perfect little ditty
To celebrate the half century of the life of a man named Chip.
But all I can think about is dip.
Lays, anyone?
Yep, there it is... the brilliance that is Danica. And a lesson to you all in why thinking that it's so much easier to have the kiddos over to your house is a really bad idea formulated in the fumes from household cleaning supplies.
Oh the pressure!!
I sit on my couch trying to think of something witty
A perfect little ditty
To celebrate the half century of the life of a man named Chip.
But all I can think about is dip.
Lays, anyone?
Yep, there it is... the brilliance that is Danica. And a lesson to you all in why thinking that it's so much easier to have the kiddos over to your house is a really bad idea formulated in the fumes from household cleaning supplies.
Thursday, May 08, 2008
Thursday Thirteen #44: Celebrating my Kiki
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Well, even though everyone wants me to do a Mother's Day blog, I'm doing one on my little Kiki. Which sort of qualifies as a Mother's Day blog, since she is my daughter. Anyway, she's my baby, and she turns four on Monday. I'm a bit sad about that, so I've been planning this blog for a while. 1. Her real name is not Kiki, but we've called her that for years. However, she's recently informed me that she is NOT a Kiki and I need to stop calling her that. She has a 15 minute explanation as to WHY she's not a Kiki, but I still can't help myself. 2. She has a strong fear of wolf-is and coy-whoa-tees. She thinks wolves and coyotes are going to attack us when we drive through the mountains, even though we've explained she's safe in the car. 3. Until recently, I loved asking her, "Whose baby are you," because she'd answer, "OARS!" But now, she tells me off for calling her a baby. 4. I've blogged a few times about having her daddy's beautiful blue eyes, but it bears mentioning again. I love those eyes! 5. She's a daredevil with no fear. She taught her big sister how to climb the monkey bars at the park. 6. She's very good at reminding me the things I "got-for"... aka forgot. 7. Being pretty is at the top of her list of things to do. We can't leave the house unless she thinks she's pretty. (And no, this does not conform to the world's standards of pretty, even though people regularly stop her and tell her how pretty she is) 8. We also call her Imelda, as in Imelda Marcos. They share a passion for shoes. 9. On personality profile tests, we score exactly the opposite on everything. 10. I once asked God why He gave me this little Kiki. Then she came running through the room, sprinkling glitter everywhere. And that's why He brought Kiki into our lives... without her, we'd have no glitter. 11. Her favorite color is pink and has made it her personal mission to convince everyone else to adopt pink as their favorite color. 12. Other nicknames for her include: The Terrorist and Birth Control. I think any person considering having children should spend some time with her before making such a rash decision. 13. Of all the jobs I do, raising her is the toughest. But I have to say, it also brings me the most joy. |
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others' comments. It’s easy, and fun! Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!
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Monday, May 05, 2008
Writing Challenge!!
Okay, fine... I admit it. I'm addicted to Crackrat. Oh wait, you already know that. And, sad to say, I have about half of my crit group addicted as well. There might be a problem with that. Sooo... for all you Crackraddicts as well as writers needing a kick in the tail, I'm offering a writing challenge.
Here it is... You have until May 19th to post your writing goal. Then, we're going to work our tails off for the next week. Whoever meets their goal by the highest percentage wins a prize. For the Crackraddicts, that'll be 1000 credits of my hard earned cash. For the rest of you, that'll be a $10 gift certificate... pick your pleasure- Starbucks, BN, etc.
Now... to sweeten the pot... I'm going to run this challenge once a month all summer. Those people who meet their writing goals EVERY month during the challenge will be eligible for a special GRAND PRIZE. I can't yet announce what it is because I haven't exactly cleared it with hubby, but if he says yes, it's going to be totally fun.
Distractions happen, especially during the summer when the kiddos are home, the weather is nice, vacations are happening, etc. So this is a little incentive to keep going. So start thinking about your goals and what it'll take to achieve them. :)
Here it is... You have until May 19th to post your writing goal. Then, we're going to work our tails off for the next week. Whoever meets their goal by the highest percentage wins a prize. For the Crackraddicts, that'll be 1000 credits of my hard earned cash. For the rest of you, that'll be a $10 gift certificate... pick your pleasure- Starbucks, BN, etc.
Now... to sweeten the pot... I'm going to run this challenge once a month all summer. Those people who meet their writing goals EVERY month during the challenge will be eligible for a special GRAND PRIZE. I can't yet announce what it is because I haven't exactly cleared it with hubby, but if he says yes, it's going to be totally fun.
Distractions happen, especially during the summer when the kiddos are home, the weather is nice, vacations are happening, etc. So this is a little incentive to keep going. So start thinking about your goals and what it'll take to achieve them. :)
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Thursday Thirteen #43: PACKRAT
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1. Some of you might think I'm talking about That Man... hahahaha... he's more of a pack-wildebeest or something immense. But I'm not. 2. Packrat is a game on Facebook. 3. My close friends and I call it Crackrat because it's more addictive than crack. Not that I've ever smoked crack. But I know someone who has, so that should count. 4. The point of the game is to collect cards to make sets. 5. To collect cards, you can either steal from your friends, the rats, buy them, or get a random drop. 6. Stealing from your friends is tricky... you can either play free for all (FFA) or co-op. FFA means you take what you want when you want. Co-op means you respect your friends- ask before you take and help each other build sets you need. 7. I only play co-op. If you steal something of mine without my permission, I will kill you. Or I'll just send my friends to make your life a living nightmare. Don't mess with me. Seriously. I mean it. 8. You can find all the information on the sets and the recipes to make the sets here: http://packrat.bluwiki.com/ 9. I have all the current sets, excluding the two released in the past day, completely vaulted. 10. Out of the retired sets, I have two completely vaulted, and three partially vaulted. 11. Packrat teaches you a lot about people... some love to help and want nothing in return. Others will help for a price. And then there's the liars and cheaters who will stop at nothing to get what they want. Which is sad, since it really is only a game. 12. The best part about crackrat, other than FINALLY getting that set vaulted, is helping one of the people you got addicted vault a set of their own. 13. And yes, I had to stop writing this post to check my pack. But no, I'm not telling you how many times. |
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others' comments. It’s easy, and fun! Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!
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Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Something Real...
Someone who will remain nameless but if you click on the link, you can find out who... does a very good job of nagging me when I don't post regularly. I saw her tonight and promised her I was working on something and would post. So, for you, oh nameless friend, here is my post.
When I talked to her about what I was going to post, I mentioned that I had a whole list of topics I wanted to blog about, but couldn't decide. But that wasn't the whole truth. The whole truth is that there is one topic I REALLY want to blog about, but haven't dared, so I keep toying with silly things not worthy of the space on the page.
Tonight, I dare. It's not pretty. It's not funny. But it's real.
I've been thinking about this ever since my friend Jan linked to my blog. She's got it under the title, "Dream, Believe, Achieve." Yeah, it's at the top of my blog. And when I started my blog, that's what I thought I wanted to blog about... dreaming, believing, and achieving your goals. And you know, I used to blog about that. Then, I started moving away from it until now, I just blog about stuff.
What kind of stuff? Real stuff. Things like I have a gassy dog (although not so much now, thanks to a revolutionary product called Dog Smog), kids who drive me nuts and to my knees with gratitude that they're mine, a Man, writing, and lots of other quirky stuff that happens in my life. But what's the point of all that stuff?
When I set out on this crazy journey as a writer, I wanted to write because I thought that somehow, my words, my experiences, and my stuff might be able to help someone else (and okay, I wanted to be able to kill people- legally). And that's still my goal. Maybe I won't solve your life's problems, but I hope that when you're done reading my blog, you'll come away feeling a little lighter than you did before.
So why am I not blogging like I used to? That Man asked me about it tonight, wondering if it had something to do with my addiction to Crackrat. And I have to admit that yes, I do spend an awful lot of time on Facebook playing the game (Crackrat, for those not in the know, is actually called Packrat, but is more addictive than crack, so I call it crackrat. If you'd like to play, let me know and I'll add you. But be warned. You steal my stuff without asking and I PROMISE I'll kill you). But that's not why I'm not blogging.
The truth... the big one that I've been working hard at not telling, is that I'm really jaded about the whole blog thing. It's the big bandwagon for authors to promote themselves. And yes, I admit that I hope once I have a book out, my blog readers will race to the stores and buy copies for themselves, their neighbors, their grandmothers, and their second grade teachers. But if I never sell a book, I hope that I still touch someone's life. And I guess I don't see that in a lot of the bandwagon bloggers out there. And then there's the Fakers... wow... this is a hard one for me to admit to. Mostly because I don't want folks to read this and say, "boy is she a big fat meanie." But maybe I am.
Here's the thing about blogs and the internet in general. We can write whatever we want and no one knows if it's the truth or a lie. We can post a great story about our lives, and it could very well be a complete work of fiction. We can pretend to be real about our feelings and share something earth-shattering about the work God is doing in our hearts, and never live it out. People say things on their blogs that they would never say to a person's face. And I guess I'm more than a little sick of it.
What does this have to do with my blog? Everything. I asked That Man, who reads my blog faithfully every day and knows me better than anyone but God, how real my blogs are. Would I say the things on my blog to a person's face? Do I live out the things I talk about? Even if I don't succeed, is there evidence that I'm really trying? Am I a Faker? Or am I Real?
I've been trying to come up with a new word. Not Real. Not Relevant. Not Transparent. Not any of the words the Fakers and their followers use to describe themselves. Because that's not me. I'm just a girl, on a journey, trying to figure out this living in God's grace thing, hoping to meet some fellow journeyers so we can all encourage each other. At the risk of giving myself away as a total cheeseball (okay, fine, I am), the thing I think about most when I think about my writing and my blog is a song from High School Musical... we're all in this together.
But I want it to be something real. Something true. Something not filled with puffed-up rhetoric about how humble I am or how great I am, but something that people can take away to help them on their journey. I'm not going to lie to you and say that this morning, I woke up early and read my Bible. I meant to, but I had to check my pack to make sure some stinky jerk who will remain nameless, however if someone tries to add you as a friend because *I* recommended him, he is a big fat liar, and you should tell him to keep his grubby paws off. Not that I'm addicted or anything. But before you pass judgment, you should know that I did do three loads of laundry, clean four toilets, one sink, the kitchen, have a tea party with my best friend and our kiddos, work on my online jobs, go to WFTJ, read kiddo a story, AND get my latest revisions out for crit so I can meet my deadline. Then again, that could be a complete lie and you'd never know it. But I hope, by the way I live my life, you know it's the truth (or you could come by and use my sparkling toilets).
So there you go... my attempt at a blog that represents what I really want my blog to be about.
When I talked to her about what I was going to post, I mentioned that I had a whole list of topics I wanted to blog about, but couldn't decide. But that wasn't the whole truth. The whole truth is that there is one topic I REALLY want to blog about, but haven't dared, so I keep toying with silly things not worthy of the space on the page.
Tonight, I dare. It's not pretty. It's not funny. But it's real.
I've been thinking about this ever since my friend Jan linked to my blog. She's got it under the title, "Dream, Believe, Achieve." Yeah, it's at the top of my blog. And when I started my blog, that's what I thought I wanted to blog about... dreaming, believing, and achieving your goals. And you know, I used to blog about that. Then, I started moving away from it until now, I just blog about stuff.
What kind of stuff? Real stuff. Things like I have a gassy dog (although not so much now, thanks to a revolutionary product called Dog Smog), kids who drive me nuts and to my knees with gratitude that they're mine, a Man, writing, and lots of other quirky stuff that happens in my life. But what's the point of all that stuff?
When I set out on this crazy journey as a writer, I wanted to write because I thought that somehow, my words, my experiences, and my stuff might be able to help someone else (and okay, I wanted to be able to kill people- legally). And that's still my goal. Maybe I won't solve your life's problems, but I hope that when you're done reading my blog, you'll come away feeling a little lighter than you did before.
So why am I not blogging like I used to? That Man asked me about it tonight, wondering if it had something to do with my addiction to Crackrat. And I have to admit that yes, I do spend an awful lot of time on Facebook playing the game (Crackrat, for those not in the know, is actually called Packrat, but is more addictive than crack, so I call it crackrat. If you'd like to play, let me know and I'll add you. But be warned. You steal my stuff without asking and I PROMISE I'll kill you). But that's not why I'm not blogging.
The truth... the big one that I've been working hard at not telling, is that I'm really jaded about the whole blog thing. It's the big bandwagon for authors to promote themselves. And yes, I admit that I hope once I have a book out, my blog readers will race to the stores and buy copies for themselves, their neighbors, their grandmothers, and their second grade teachers. But if I never sell a book, I hope that I still touch someone's life. And I guess I don't see that in a lot of the bandwagon bloggers out there. And then there's the Fakers... wow... this is a hard one for me to admit to. Mostly because I don't want folks to read this and say, "boy is she a big fat meanie." But maybe I am.
Here's the thing about blogs and the internet in general. We can write whatever we want and no one knows if it's the truth or a lie. We can post a great story about our lives, and it could very well be a complete work of fiction. We can pretend to be real about our feelings and share something earth-shattering about the work God is doing in our hearts, and never live it out. People say things on their blogs that they would never say to a person's face. And I guess I'm more than a little sick of it.
What does this have to do with my blog? Everything. I asked That Man, who reads my blog faithfully every day and knows me better than anyone but God, how real my blogs are. Would I say the things on my blog to a person's face? Do I live out the things I talk about? Even if I don't succeed, is there evidence that I'm really trying? Am I a Faker? Or am I Real?
I've been trying to come up with a new word. Not Real. Not Relevant. Not Transparent. Not any of the words the Fakers and their followers use to describe themselves. Because that's not me. I'm just a girl, on a journey, trying to figure out this living in God's grace thing, hoping to meet some fellow journeyers so we can all encourage each other. At the risk of giving myself away as a total cheeseball (okay, fine, I am), the thing I think about most when I think about my writing and my blog is a song from High School Musical... we're all in this together.
But I want it to be something real. Something true. Something not filled with puffed-up rhetoric about how humble I am or how great I am, but something that people can take away to help them on their journey. I'm not going to lie to you and say that this morning, I woke up early and read my Bible. I meant to, but I had to check my pack to make sure some stinky jerk who will remain nameless, however if someone tries to add you as a friend because *I* recommended him, he is a big fat liar, and you should tell him to keep his grubby paws off. Not that I'm addicted or anything. But before you pass judgment, you should know that I did do three loads of laundry, clean four toilets, one sink, the kitchen, have a tea party with my best friend and our kiddos, work on my online jobs, go to WFTJ, read kiddo a story, AND get my latest revisions out for crit so I can meet my deadline. Then again, that could be a complete lie and you'd never know it. But I hope, by the way I live my life, you know it's the truth (or you could come by and use my sparkling toilets).
So there you go... my attempt at a blog that represents what I really want my blog to be about.
Thursday, April 24, 2008
Thursday Thirteen #42: Healing Promises by Amy Wallace
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I love helping folks out by promoting their books when they have a blog tour. Except I get tired of reading the same old reviews over and over... so, as many of you know, I like to switch things up a bit. Which leads to this week's Thursday Thirteen. Amy's book deals with a lot of issues, but I think one of the larger themes is finding hope in dark circumstances. In her discussion questions, she asks the following question(s). Clint and Sara struggled to believe God's promises when life gave them a multitude of reasons to stop hoping. How do you stay open to hope and to God? And so, in proper Thursday Thirteen form, I'm sharing thirteen reasons found in Healing Promises to keep hoping. 1. God is in us. 1 John 4:15-16 "If anyone acknowledges that Jesus is the Son of God, God lives in him and he in God. 16 And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him." 2. God helps us overcome. 1 John 4:4, 5:4 "You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world." "for everyone born of God overcomes the world" 3. God has great plans for us. Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." 4. We can rest in God's hope. Psalm 62:5 "Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from him." 5. God's plan, even if we don't understand it at the time, works toward His purpose. Romans 8:28 "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." 6. God doesn't promise to end our suffering, but to use it for our good. Romans 5:3-5 "Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; 4perseverance, character; and character, hope. 5And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us." 7. We need to bless the Lord regardless of our circumstances. Job 1:21 ""Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked I will depart. The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away; may the name of the LORD be praised." 8. We need to learn to stop depending on people and circumstances. Those change, while the Lord remains constant. 9. Because God is with us, we have nothing to fear. Isaiah 41:10 "So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." 10. God has already won the battles we fight. John 16:33 ""I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."" 11. The Lord is our protector. Psalm 18:2 "The LORD is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge. He is my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold." 12. For those who know the Lord, death is not final. 1 Thessalonians 4:13-15 "Brothers, we do not want you to be ignorant about those who fall asleep, or to grieve like the rest of men, who have no hope. 14We believe that Jesus died and rose again and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in him. 15According to the Lord's own word, we tell you that we who are still alive, who are left till the coming of the Lord, will certainly not precede those who have fallen asleep." 13. Finally, the love of the Lord never fails. Amy talks about 1 Corinthians 13:8, but I'll let you look that up if you want. Instead, I'm going to share the verse that most strongly shows this for me. Jeremiah 31:3 ""I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with loving-kindness." No matter what circumstances you're in, or how dark the world appears, just as the characters in Healing Promises learned, God's love overcomes all. He is our strength and will carry us through. To learn more about this incredible book, visit Amy's website, Heart Chocolate, for sample chapters, a great newsletter, and other information. |
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others' comments. It’s easy, and fun! Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!
View More Thursday Thirteen Participants
Sunday, April 20, 2008
Little presents from God
I don't get to see my best friend very often. She lives about 45 minutes away and is a very busy working mom who not only has a full-time job, but somehow manages to cart around her kiddos with all their extra activities. She once told me her son's schedule and I about had a heart attack. Not only are we best friends, but we were pregnant together, I was there (with my own big belly) when her daughter was born, and now, our little girls are best friends too. I love it when life works out that way.
Anyway, she was recently promoted, which means I've seen less of her. She's going through training at the store by my house, but it's a weird schedule and she's got no real breaks that she can spend with me.
This weekend we worked on installing a sprinkler system in our yard. It's a lot of work to say the least. I've been needing to go to the store, but didn't want to leave hubby alone with the kiddos while running equipment, nor did I want to bring them. And then I procrastinated, playing packrat, cleaning the house, and chasing the kiddos. Finally, I REALLY had to go to the store.
So there I was, wandering the aisle, looking for a container to put legos in. And there she was. I think we both almost burst into tears. We hugged, talked, and she helped me find the perfect lego container. Fortunately, she happened to be working in that department and also happened to have the same container for her daughter's toys. We only got a few minutes, but she was able to share some things about her life and what's going on with her. Things she needed to share with someone, but couldn't because of her hectic schedule.
As I drove home, I thought about what an amazing coincidence it was that we happened to be in the same aisle at the same time... I was supposed to have gone earlier in the day and she usually doesn't work Sundays. It's also one of her last days at this store before she gets her new store. And... it's a big store and not her usual department. I think God knew that we both needed that moment of connecting with each other, even if for only a few minutes.
Sometimes we ask God for really big things and wonder why we aren't getting them. It's like the little kid who wants a pony... he asks mom and dad for a pony, but at the time, a pony's not feasible. However, mom and dad keep giving the kid other gifts. But because the kiddo is so focused on that pony, a lot of times, the kid doesn't recognize all the other gifts mom and dad are giving him. I think God's a lot like that. We focus on the answer we want, and sometimes we miss the small blessings. I'm so thankful that God is a loving father who chooses to give me good things. Sometimes it's the big things, but sometimes, it's the small lagniappe of running into my best friend for a much-needed hug.
Anyway, she was recently promoted, which means I've seen less of her. She's going through training at the store by my house, but it's a weird schedule and she's got no real breaks that she can spend with me.
This weekend we worked on installing a sprinkler system in our yard. It's a lot of work to say the least. I've been needing to go to the store, but didn't want to leave hubby alone with the kiddos while running equipment, nor did I want to bring them. And then I procrastinated, playing packrat, cleaning the house, and chasing the kiddos. Finally, I REALLY had to go to the store.
So there I was, wandering the aisle, looking for a container to put legos in. And there she was. I think we both almost burst into tears. We hugged, talked, and she helped me find the perfect lego container. Fortunately, she happened to be working in that department and also happened to have the same container for her daughter's toys. We only got a few minutes, but she was able to share some things about her life and what's going on with her. Things she needed to share with someone, but couldn't because of her hectic schedule.
As I drove home, I thought about what an amazing coincidence it was that we happened to be in the same aisle at the same time... I was supposed to have gone earlier in the day and she usually doesn't work Sundays. It's also one of her last days at this store before she gets her new store. And... it's a big store and not her usual department. I think God knew that we both needed that moment of connecting with each other, even if for only a few minutes.
Sometimes we ask God for really big things and wonder why we aren't getting them. It's like the little kid who wants a pony... he asks mom and dad for a pony, but at the time, a pony's not feasible. However, mom and dad keep giving the kid other gifts. But because the kiddo is so focused on that pony, a lot of times, the kid doesn't recognize all the other gifts mom and dad are giving him. I think God's a lot like that. We focus on the answer we want, and sometimes we miss the small blessings. I'm so thankful that God is a loving father who chooses to give me good things. Sometimes it's the big things, but sometimes, it's the small lagniappe of running into my best friend for a much-needed hug.
Thursday, April 17, 2008
Thursday Thirteen #41: Post Tax Season
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So now that I'm semi done with tax season, I thought I'd post a few things I'm going to do to celebrate... 1. Sleep. Hasn't happened yet, but any day now... 2. Work on revisions. 3. Find a way to get those wretched squirrels out of my porch. 4. Clean my house (why hasn't the bulldozer fairy dropped one off yet?) 5. Do something fun with the kiddos. 6. Go on a date with the hubby. 7. Catch up on reading. 8. Shave my legs. 9. Organize my office. 10. Pay my bills. 11. Start my garden. 12. Go on walks. 13. Finally catch up on everyone else's blogs and get back to regular blogging |
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others' comments. It’s easy, and fun! Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!
View More Thursday Thirteen Participants
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Yes, I know...
But let's pretend I've been a good little blogger. And let's pretend I haven't had a few really crummy days with a few bright spots. Let's just pretend all is normal in Danicaland and focus on one beautiful, amazing thing....
I HAVE MY LIFE BACK!!!!!
Tax season is officially over. While I do have a few cleanup things to do, I am pretty well done. Yep yep yep.
I am so happy.
I am so exhausted.
Does anyone want to take my kiddos for a couple days so I can sleep?
I HAVE MY LIFE BACK!!!!!
Tax season is officially over. While I do have a few cleanup things to do, I am pretty well done. Yep yep yep.
I am so happy.
I am so exhausted.
Does anyone want to take my kiddos for a couple days so I can sleep?
Friday, April 11, 2008
Pure randomness
For all my lovely friends who've been nagging me... I'm sorry. Not only is it the last week of tax season, but a new project I've been waiting to launch has finally launched, AND another thing I've been waiting on is happening now, AND somehow I managed to get myself addicted to packrat.
Just shush. I do not want to hear it.
On top of all that, I've got insomnia something fierce. I'm in bed and all I can think about is everything else I have to do. I try to take a nap and the dishes piling up in the sink start calling my name. The dark circles under my eyes have dark circles.
But you're not here to read my complaints. Somehow, I'm supposed to entertain and uplift you. Or make you laugh. And trust me, there's nothing funny about insomnia or the mess my house is in or the fact that life is just piling up on me. But knowing some of you, you're probably laughing. Good for you. Go ahead. Amuse yourselves at my expense. There's a dead body in a future book with your name on it.
And that's pretty funny too... I was talking with someone about this the other night. As much as I talk smack about killing people and all the gory things I'd do, I have yet to actually do it in a book. Except my hero. He's really in a coma. Er, was. He woke up this chapter, so we're all quite thrilled. But I'm still singing "boyfriend in a coma." Does anyone remember that song? I'm writing this beautiful heart wrenching scene and I'm singing a rather funny song.
Lack of sleep, I tell you. Lack of sleep. Seriously, I am the funniest person I know when I don't get my ten hours. I'm working on 5-6. I think. I went to bed last night at 1, spent most of the night tossing and turning and being kicked by kiddo who connived her way into our bed, and finally got up at 6:30 to help other kiddo get ready for school and take out the recycling because it's recycling day and That Man always forgets. I tried to go back to sleep but we have wood peckers. Have you ever seen the movie "Failure to Launch"? The girl and the mockingbird... I feel her pain. For us, it's wood peckers. One pecks on the metal vents on the roof, the other pecks on the gutters in response. They peck and peck and peck and peck and peck and peck and peck and peck and peck. It echoes through my house.
I am going crazy.
Speaking of going crazy, and the real reason for my rambling post other than to let folks know I really am alive (which you'd know if you played packrat... but don't you dare play if you're going to steal my cards, because then I really WILL kill you and put you in a book).... I'm helping out with a giveaway for my dear friend Cheryl Wyatt. I've just told you a whole lot of random stuff that's going on in my life. Now I'm going to tell you something really random about her. She got her first motorcycle at age five. And if you're part of the ACFW book club and are playing the game, you've just been given an important clue.
If you aren't a member of the ACFW book club, then why not? Not only do they discuss great books (like Cheryl's), but they have some fun contests. So click here to join.
Finally, because I'm so nice and free with giving away other people's stuff, plus, I figure I owe it to you for forcing you to read my rambling to get the answer, I'm going to pick a winner out of all the comments for a free Cheryl Wyatt book. So tell me something random about your crazy life. Craziest, most random event wins.
Just shush. I do not want to hear it.
On top of all that, I've got insomnia something fierce. I'm in bed and all I can think about is everything else I have to do. I try to take a nap and the dishes piling up in the sink start calling my name. The dark circles under my eyes have dark circles.
But you're not here to read my complaints. Somehow, I'm supposed to entertain and uplift you. Or make you laugh. And trust me, there's nothing funny about insomnia or the mess my house is in or the fact that life is just piling up on me. But knowing some of you, you're probably laughing. Good for you. Go ahead. Amuse yourselves at my expense. There's a dead body in a future book with your name on it.
And that's pretty funny too... I was talking with someone about this the other night. As much as I talk smack about killing people and all the gory things I'd do, I have yet to actually do it in a book. Except my hero. He's really in a coma. Er, was. He woke up this chapter, so we're all quite thrilled. But I'm still singing "boyfriend in a coma." Does anyone remember that song? I'm writing this beautiful heart wrenching scene and I'm singing a rather funny song.
Lack of sleep, I tell you. Lack of sleep. Seriously, I am the funniest person I know when I don't get my ten hours. I'm working on 5-6. I think. I went to bed last night at 1, spent most of the night tossing and turning and being kicked by kiddo who connived her way into our bed, and finally got up at 6:30 to help other kiddo get ready for school and take out the recycling because it's recycling day and That Man always forgets. I tried to go back to sleep but we have wood peckers. Have you ever seen the movie "Failure to Launch"? The girl and the mockingbird... I feel her pain. For us, it's wood peckers. One pecks on the metal vents on the roof, the other pecks on the gutters in response. They peck and peck and peck and peck and peck and peck and peck and peck and peck. It echoes through my house.
I am going crazy.
Speaking of going crazy, and the real reason for my rambling post other than to let folks know I really am alive (which you'd know if you played packrat... but don't you dare play if you're going to steal my cards, because then I really WILL kill you and put you in a book).... I'm helping out with a giveaway for my dear friend Cheryl Wyatt. I've just told you a whole lot of random stuff that's going on in my life. Now I'm going to tell you something really random about her. She got her first motorcycle at age five. And if you're part of the ACFW book club and are playing the game, you've just been given an important clue.
If you aren't a member of the ACFW book club, then why not? Not only do they discuss great books (like Cheryl's), but they have some fun contests. So click here to join.
Finally, because I'm so nice and free with giving away other people's stuff, plus, I figure I owe it to you for forcing you to read my rambling to get the answer, I'm going to pick a winner out of all the comments for a free Cheryl Wyatt book. So tell me something random about your crazy life. Craziest, most random event wins.
Wednesday, April 02, 2008
Thursday Thirteen #40: Reasons I need a bulldozer
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1. Because you can't walk through my dining room with all the clean laundry piled up. 2. You also can't walk through the living room with all the MOPS sale stuff piled up. 3. You can't walk through the basement with all the kid stuff piled up. 4. You can't walk through my bedroom with all the dirty laundry piled up. Notice a theme here? 5. You can't see my kitchen counter with all the mail and school papers piled up. 6. You can't see my sink with all the dishes stacked up. 7. There's a big dirt pile in my back yard that needs to be flattened. 8. We have ugly evergreen bushes in the front yard that I want gone. 9. It might be helpful for next winter for snow removal. 10. I have boxes of papers in my office to sort. 11. Did I mention our storage unit that needs to be cleaned out? 12. Because I think it would be fun to squish stuff. 13. And, as my stepfather likes to say, you never know when a bulldozer will come in handy. |
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others' comments. It’s easy, and fun! Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!
View More Thursday Thirteen Participants
Tuesday, April 01, 2008
Oh how the mighty have fallen...
In my last post, I was extremely excited about filing my taxes.
Today, I realized something terrible.
Oh great wonderful tax person that I am...
I filed my own taxes wrong.
Poor hubby's going to have a heart attack when he reads this. The good news is, it only sets us back about $300, so we'll still have plenty of money. The bad news is, I'm going to be teased mercilessly about it for a very long time.
Basically, what happened was that when I went to file my Federal taxes, I used a W2 off our company's HR site. I missed the part about it being LAST YEAR'S. So when I went to file our state this evening (I did them separate... and a good thing, since that's how I found the mistake), I realized two things: one, the W2 was for the wrong year, so I understated our income and two, I didn't add back our state tax refund (they didn't send me a form!). GRRRRR
Fortunately, I am a trained professional, and I've gotten quite good at filing amended returns for other people who do stupid things on their taxes. Now, I'm the stupid person, and fortunately, I think I've finally gotten our taxes right.
*insert long sigh*
The other really good thing is that I discovered the mistake prior to April 15th, which means I'll get the corrections out to them by the deadline, so I won't owe penalties or interest. YAY!
Hey, I've got to have something to be happy about.
Today, I realized something terrible.
Oh great wonderful tax person that I am...
I filed my own taxes wrong.
Poor hubby's going to have a heart attack when he reads this. The good news is, it only sets us back about $300, so we'll still have plenty of money. The bad news is, I'm going to be teased mercilessly about it for a very long time.
Basically, what happened was that when I went to file my Federal taxes, I used a W2 off our company's HR site. I missed the part about it being LAST YEAR'S. So when I went to file our state this evening (I did them separate... and a good thing, since that's how I found the mistake), I realized two things: one, the W2 was for the wrong year, so I understated our income and two, I didn't add back our state tax refund (they didn't send me a form!). GRRRRR
Fortunately, I am a trained professional, and I've gotten quite good at filing amended returns for other people who do stupid things on their taxes. Now, I'm the stupid person, and fortunately, I think I've finally gotten our taxes right.
*insert long sigh*
The other really good thing is that I discovered the mistake prior to April 15th, which means I'll get the corrections out to them by the deadline, so I won't owe penalties or interest. YAY!
Hey, I've got to have something to be happy about.
Saturday, March 29, 2008
It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood...
First of all, today is the first day in a really long time that I got off work before dark. AND I didn't work a 12 hour Saturday. YAY Me!!
Second, I finished our taxes!!! You what they say about the kind of car the mechanic's wife drives? Well, the tax preparer almost never has her taxes done before April. And mine are DONE!! And we're getting a bigger refund than I'd anticipated. I'm so glad we had to pay points when we bought our house. :)
Third, my coughing is much more manageable and I'm actually *gasp* starting to feel better.
All in all, it's been a banner day. How about yours?
Second, I finished our taxes!!! You what they say about the kind of car the mechanic's wife drives? Well, the tax preparer almost never has her taxes done before April. And mine are DONE!! And we're getting a bigger refund than I'd anticipated. I'm so glad we had to pay points when we bought our house. :)
Third, my coughing is much more manageable and I'm actually *gasp* starting to feel better.
All in all, it's been a banner day. How about yours?
Thursday, March 27, 2008
Thursday Thirteen #39: Naptime
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Yes, my friends, it's naptime... and all the reasons why... 1. I'm tired. 2. I have a cold. 3. The kiddos are home for spring break and driving me nuts. 4. It's an overcast day. 5. I just finished reading some contest entries for a friend. 6. My couch is comfy. 7. So's my bed. 8. And my house is a mess. 9. My dog is snuggly. 10. I don't have time to do anything else before going to work. 11. I need my strength to work tonight. 12. I can't stop yawning. 13. And really, I just feel like taking a nap. |
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others' comments. It’s easy, and fun! Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!
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Tuesday, March 25, 2008
I promise I'm not dead
I just have the sort of virus that makes you wonder if you have any tissue remaining in your lungs or if it's all now on its way to the dump with the rest of the 500 boxes of tissues you've used in the past few days. I must also confess to wondering if parts of my brain might have exited via my nose.
The good news is I'm on the mend.
The bad news is a lot of other things have happened since I last blogged and I will be unable to tell you about any of it. And I think some of it might have been entertaining.
Oh well. That's life I suppose.
Hope you all had a good Easter.
The good news is I'm on the mend.
The bad news is a lot of other things have happened since I last blogged and I will be unable to tell you about any of it. And I think some of it might have been entertaining.
Oh well. That's life I suppose.
Hope you all had a good Easter.
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
Thursday Thirteen #38: Things I found while unpacking my office
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As many of you know, we bought a new house in August. Yay us! However, in all the moving/packing/etc, I was mostly an observer, as I'd just had surgery and was on restriction. Which means I have dozens of boxes labeled "Danica" and have no idea what's in them. So, as we moved into the new house, and as we're (STILL) getting things out of storage, those boxes get shoved into my office. I'm trying to get our taxes done but am missing a bunch of stuff, so thought I'd dig in and see what I could find. And here it is... 1. Love notes from an old boyfriend... this was at the start of my internet years, so they're a whole bunch of printed emails. Some of them are pretty interesting. I should probably get rid of them, except that a few had some things that would make a pretty good book. Guess we'll see what That Man (who does read my blog daily) thinks. 2. My first breakup poem. Written in 9th grade. Or maybe 10th. Had rather creative descriptions, like "your ugly stork legs" ending with "I HATE YOU" written in very large letters. I should frame it. 3. Copies of the literary journals from middle school and high school featuring my work... man, I was so proud they accepted my writing. Some things never change, I guess. 4. A notebook one of my writing teachers gave me to fill up with all of my writing. I think I unpacked about 20 more like it tonight. I'm definitely prolific. 5. Copies of the articles I wrote for the school paper. I had a humor column. Maybe I'll post some on my blog. They're mostly funny because they're so bad. 6. My high school AP history binder with all my notes. No idea why I kept it, of all things. Maybe it's because of my love for history. Or maybe it's because Mr. Shepherd was one of my all-time favorite teachers. 7. A card that came with some flowers I got when I had my youngest. It was with some random papers. 8. My old checkbooks from high school and college. I'm thinking I need to buy a shredder. 9. A wrapped present. No idea what it is or who it's to. 10. A book I thought I sent my grandma. Oops. 11. Another binder with some papers I wrote in college. Hmmm... are we seeing a theme here? 12. Some letters from one of the most negative influences in my life during one of the darkest points in my life. I'd thought I burned everything from this person. Anyone want to come over for another bonfire? 13. The receipt from my first "official" date with That Man. (Which was ten years ago in April) I can't decide if I'm going to do a cool frame collage thing or put it in a scrapbook. First, I have to find a picture of us from when we were dating. So there it is.. a glimpse into the mess known as my office. I emptied five boxes, and shoved about five more into a closet because I didn't have the energy to sort through all those papers. Most of it will probably end up in a landfill somewhere, but given that I'm finding weird things in random boxes, I need to go through it all. I'm STILL missing receipts I need for my taxes. Oh well, if I don't find them, I'll leave it off the return, and if I get audited, I'll just have extra deductions to show them. Or something. |
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others' comments. It’s easy, and fun! Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!
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Tuesday, March 18, 2008
Making time for the important things
One of the most important things that came out of the retreat was a renewed focus on God. After spending forty hours of doing nothing other than contemplating the Lord, it's hard not to think about priorities. We watched a Rob Bell video on noise, and the thing that struck me was one of the questions he asked about what we're filling our time with.
I've been frustrated lately because I haven't had time for Bible study. I'd planned for my evenings, after everyone's in bed, to spend that time with the Lord. But I get home, and I'm so tired from everything else I have going on that the words on the page start to run together. But I'm so wired that I can't sleep. So I sit up and play computer games. I find it relaxing. Except then I never find time to spend with the Lord.
Do you see where I'm going with this?
If I say God is the most important thing in my life, why haven't I fit Him in?
The truth is, I fill my life with a lot of noise.
I started to examine a lot of the things in my life, a lot of my priorities. I had to ask myself the tough questions, like: "Does the time I spend playing computer games add to my relationship with God? Does it further the purpose He has in my life? Does it accomplish anything useful in my life?"
Now, before I get folks flaming me for attacking computer games, let me just say that I don't think there's anything wrong with them. Given the right time and place. But when I use them to fill up my "God time" that's a huge problem.
So I'm choosing to give up computer games. Not entirely. But rather than being my means to unwind, they are a reward. Something I get to do after everything else that's important, everything that adds to my life, is done. I'm giving up a lot of other things, too. Some of them I'm not able to share completely, but I do want to share one piece... the part where I'm examining and making decisions.
I keep coming back to the question... while I enjoy it, and it's something that makes me happy, how does it add to my relationship with Christ? How does it add to the ministry He's given me?
The Bible talks about being double-minded. Never in a good way. When we have so much going on, we can't help but become double-minded. Even though all the things I have in my life are good things, and certainly all have served the Lord, they don't allow me to keep my focus where it should be.
I've given myself a year... time to figure out and cut out the things that are taking away from what's really important. It means saying no to things I used to say yes to. It means disappointing people who are counting on me. It means giving up things I really enjoy. But it also means gaining precious time for the things that really matter to me.
So the question for those of you who are eagerly looking to my journey in hopes you can glean wisdom for your own is...
What's the noise you need to cut out of your life?
I've been frustrated lately because I haven't had time for Bible study. I'd planned for my evenings, after everyone's in bed, to spend that time with the Lord. But I get home, and I'm so tired from everything else I have going on that the words on the page start to run together. But I'm so wired that I can't sleep. So I sit up and play computer games. I find it relaxing. Except then I never find time to spend with the Lord.
Do you see where I'm going with this?
If I say God is the most important thing in my life, why haven't I fit Him in?
The truth is, I fill my life with a lot of noise.
I started to examine a lot of the things in my life, a lot of my priorities. I had to ask myself the tough questions, like: "Does the time I spend playing computer games add to my relationship with God? Does it further the purpose He has in my life? Does it accomplish anything useful in my life?"
Now, before I get folks flaming me for attacking computer games, let me just say that I don't think there's anything wrong with them. Given the right time and place. But when I use them to fill up my "God time" that's a huge problem.
So I'm choosing to give up computer games. Not entirely. But rather than being my means to unwind, they are a reward. Something I get to do after everything else that's important, everything that adds to my life, is done. I'm giving up a lot of other things, too. Some of them I'm not able to share completely, but I do want to share one piece... the part where I'm examining and making decisions.
I keep coming back to the question... while I enjoy it, and it's something that makes me happy, how does it add to my relationship with Christ? How does it add to the ministry He's given me?
The Bible talks about being double-minded. Never in a good way. When we have so much going on, we can't help but become double-minded. Even though all the things I have in my life are good things, and certainly all have served the Lord, they don't allow me to keep my focus where it should be.
I've given myself a year... time to figure out and cut out the things that are taking away from what's really important. It means saying no to things I used to say yes to. It means disappointing people who are counting on me. It means giving up things I really enjoy. But it also means gaining precious time for the things that really matter to me.
So the question for those of you who are eagerly looking to my journey in hopes you can glean wisdom for your own is...
What's the noise you need to cut out of your life?
Monday, March 17, 2008
Sweet Joy...
The silent retreat was the most amazing experience ever.
Ever.
I'll be sharing some of my thoughts over the next um... rest of my life, because truly, it was life-changing.
Honestly, I miss it already. I miss the silence. I miss having nothing better to do than enjoy God's presence. I miss sitting with Him and just... sitting.
It's been a few hours since I've read the Bible, and I crave it. I hunger. I need the sweet joy of his words.
One of the things that came out of a weekend of intentional silence and focus on the Lord is the necessity for greater intentionality in my life. And I'll be honest. It means making some decisions that are going to be hard at first. It means giving up things that have filled my life for a long time. Meaningless things. Bad habits. Changing patterns of behavior that have been with me as long as I can remember.
I'm actually looking forward to it.
I'm giving up so much, and yet the joy of what I'm gaining... I can't even measure.
Ever.
I'll be sharing some of my thoughts over the next um... rest of my life, because truly, it was life-changing.
Honestly, I miss it already. I miss the silence. I miss having nothing better to do than enjoy God's presence. I miss sitting with Him and just... sitting.
It's been a few hours since I've read the Bible, and I crave it. I hunger. I need the sweet joy of his words.
One of the things that came out of a weekend of intentional silence and focus on the Lord is the necessity for greater intentionality in my life. And I'll be honest. It means making some decisions that are going to be hard at first. It means giving up things that have filled my life for a long time. Meaningless things. Bad habits. Changing patterns of behavior that have been with me as long as I can remember.
I'm actually looking forward to it.
I'm giving up so much, and yet the joy of what I'm gaining... I can't even measure.
Thursday, March 13, 2008
How well they know me...
Yesterday, I put a request on the ACFW loop for some research assistance in victim notification. I got a lot of great responses, but the best one was from my CP.
It said:
Who'd you kill this time?
Sigh.
How well she knows me.
In my defense, I did NOT kill anyone. Merely severely injured, possibly in a coma, but not dead. He's the hero, after all. I understand it's bad form to kill the hero, especially in the first 1/4 of the book. I'm cooking along on the book, #3 in the series, since I expect I'll be getting some edits back next week on #1, which means I'll be back in edit-blah-dom, and out of creative land. Ugh.
Tomorrow, I head up the mountain for a much-anticipated retreat. Our church is having a silent retreat as part of Lent. As I tell people how excited I am about it, they all have the same response: "You're going to be silent for an entire weekend?"
Sigh.
I admit, it may be a challenge, but I'm also soooo excited to have an entire weekend without, "Mom! Come wipe my butt!" It's going to be great to have forty hours to focus on the Lord. And maybe get a little more writing done before I'm slung back into edit mode.
Sigh.
It said:
Who'd you kill this time?
Sigh.
How well she knows me.
In my defense, I did NOT kill anyone. Merely severely injured, possibly in a coma, but not dead. He's the hero, after all. I understand it's bad form to kill the hero, especially in the first 1/4 of the book. I'm cooking along on the book, #3 in the series, since I expect I'll be getting some edits back next week on #1, which means I'll be back in edit-blah-dom, and out of creative land. Ugh.
Tomorrow, I head up the mountain for a much-anticipated retreat. Our church is having a silent retreat as part of Lent. As I tell people how excited I am about it, they all have the same response: "You're going to be silent for an entire weekend?"
Sigh.
I admit, it may be a challenge, but I'm also soooo excited to have an entire weekend without, "Mom! Come wipe my butt!" It's going to be great to have forty hours to focus on the Lord. And maybe get a little more writing done before I'm slung back into edit mode.
Sigh.
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
Thursday Thirteen #37: In honor of That Man's Birthday
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Since I still haven't found a gift for him other than my presence (which really, should be present enough), this week's Thursday Thirteen is in honor of his birthday. 1. He's a brilliant designer... if you need something built, he can figure it out and create it. 2. One of the things I found attractive in him was his motto: Why be normal? 3. He's addicted to James Bond. 4. We have a don't ask/don't tell policy... don't ask about his tools, I don't tell about my books. 5. I also found the fact that he's a doting father attractive. 6. He's a history nerd like me- we spent our honeymoon on a road trip examining historical sites of interest. 7. He's got the second most gorgeous blue eyes I've ever seen. The first belong to our daughter, whose beautiful blues are an answered prayer. 8. He's really cute in his pajama pants. 9. His mission statement, even though it's not totally accurate for today, completely inspires me. We're talking Jerry Maguire here. 10. He thinks I'm the sexiest woman alive, which makes him the sexiest man alive. 11. He gets a cheesecake every year for his birthday. I still owe him this year's. 12. He's only got one facial expression. After ten years, I'm starting to be able to decipher it. 13. He loves me more than any other human being I've ever met. And isn't that just the best thing about anyone? |
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others' comments. It’s easy, and fun! Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!
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Tuesday, March 11, 2008
The only deadly sin
I haven't been feeling well lately. The doctors are mystified. So today, as I tried to drag myself out of bed to go to WFTJ, I decided not to. I took the kiddo to school and plopped my exhausted self back in bed. I spent most of the day sleeping.
And then, horror struck. My doorbell rang. Now, my house has a very firm "No Solicitors" sign pasted near the bell. My assumption: the person ringing the bell has a very important reason for doing so. Twice. You all know where this story is headed, don't you?
I opened the door to find a very perky couple identifying themselves as being from some organization. I firmly told them I wasn't interested. Perky woman tries to step into my house. My House. I told them I wasn't interested again and shut the door.
Now, here's what future solicitors need to know about showing up at MY HOUSE. The sign says "No Solicitors." As a courtesy, allow me to share the definition of solicitor from my beloved Dictionary.com, "One that solicits, especially one that seeks trade or contributions." And, in case you don't know what the word "solicits" means, here it is: "To seek to obtain by persuasion, entreaty, or formal application" and my favorite "To petition persistently; importune."
So here it is: broken down in plain English. If you ring my doorbell and want to tell me about whatever it is that you're selling or seeking donations for, DON'T. The sign says not to. If you can't read, then I don't want to entrust my money with your organization. As a writer, I think literacy is important. If you can read and are choosing not to respect my sign, then I'm choosing not to support an organization who chooses not to respect ME.
How does all of this relate to the only deadly sin? Ask my husband. In our home, waking me is punishable by death. Particularly when I don't feel well. Particularly when I'm ignoring all items of importance to spend my precious day sleeping. Particularly when said interruption leaves me unable to go back to sleep. Particularly when said interrupter is perky. Have I mentioned that I hate perky people? Especially upon waking.
I was hoping to leave my state of hibernation to tell you I feel much better, am much happier, and am back to my old self. Now, all I have to say is that I'm still tired, grouchier, and now I have a headache. I can still hear the doorbell echoing against my throbbing skull.
And then, I had a horrible thought. Given that I wasn't wearing my glasses, and I very well could have just slammed the door in my own mother's face, what if I just slammed the door in Jesus' face?
Sometimes, being an old grouch does not pay.
Worst of all, I still haven't gone out and bought the hubby a birthday present. Yep, it's his birthday. So make it up to him and post a great big happy birthday to That Man. I would, but I have a headache.
And then, horror struck. My doorbell rang. Now, my house has a very firm "No Solicitors" sign pasted near the bell. My assumption: the person ringing the bell has a very important reason for doing so. Twice. You all know where this story is headed, don't you?
I opened the door to find a very perky couple identifying themselves as being from some organization. I firmly told them I wasn't interested. Perky woman tries to step into my house. My House. I told them I wasn't interested again and shut the door.
Now, here's what future solicitors need to know about showing up at MY HOUSE. The sign says "No Solicitors." As a courtesy, allow me to share the definition of solicitor from my beloved Dictionary.com, "One that solicits, especially one that seeks trade or contributions." And, in case you don't know what the word "solicits" means, here it is: "To seek to obtain by persuasion, entreaty, or formal application" and my favorite "To petition persistently; importune."
So here it is: broken down in plain English. If you ring my doorbell and want to tell me about whatever it is that you're selling or seeking donations for, DON'T. The sign says not to. If you can't read, then I don't want to entrust my money with your organization. As a writer, I think literacy is important. If you can read and are choosing not to respect my sign, then I'm choosing not to support an organization who chooses not to respect ME.
How does all of this relate to the only deadly sin? Ask my husband. In our home, waking me is punishable by death. Particularly when I don't feel well. Particularly when I'm ignoring all items of importance to spend my precious day sleeping. Particularly when said interruption leaves me unable to go back to sleep. Particularly when said interrupter is perky. Have I mentioned that I hate perky people? Especially upon waking.
I was hoping to leave my state of hibernation to tell you I feel much better, am much happier, and am back to my old self. Now, all I have to say is that I'm still tired, grouchier, and now I have a headache. I can still hear the doorbell echoing against my throbbing skull.
And then, I had a horrible thought. Given that I wasn't wearing my glasses, and I very well could have just slammed the door in my own mother's face, what if I just slammed the door in Jesus' face?
Sometimes, being an old grouch does not pay.
Worst of all, I still haven't gone out and bought the hubby a birthday present. Yep, it's his birthday. So make it up to him and post a great big happy birthday to That Man. I would, but I have a headache.
Saturday, March 08, 2008
How many posts can I attempt in one night?
I've been trying to blog all night. But I get about ten sentences into it and realize it's snoozably boring.
I tried blogging about my latest book. It's tres faboo. I'm absolutely loving working on something brand new. This is my favorite part of writing, getting to know a new set of characters, seeing where they take me, and enjoying the journey. And that's about where I started to get boring.
So I decided to blog about this funny story from work. And then I realized it's only funny if you have the visual, and since I didn't think to take a picture, no one would get the joke.
Then, I thought I'd blog about a special moment I had with the littlest one. But again, it requires photographic evidence, and again, I didn't take a picture.
I could tell you about my exceedingly busy day, but that's certainly not very interesting.
Exceedingly. And that, my friends, is yet another possible blog topic. I'm watching Pride and Prejudice (Keira Knightly version) right now. I'm pretty sure I counted the use of that word ten times in a five minute period. Exceedingly exceeding, I'm sure. I've decided this is my least favorite Jane Austen movie. And I think I might like the Colin Firth version better. Exceedingly. But I think perhaps I should watch it again to be sure.
So there you have it. All the thoughts running through my brain. And one other little happy thought I'm not quite ready to share yet, although I will be exceedingly happy when I do so.
I tried blogging about my latest book. It's tres faboo. I'm absolutely loving working on something brand new. This is my favorite part of writing, getting to know a new set of characters, seeing where they take me, and enjoying the journey. And that's about where I started to get boring.
So I decided to blog about this funny story from work. And then I realized it's only funny if you have the visual, and since I didn't think to take a picture, no one would get the joke.
Then, I thought I'd blog about a special moment I had with the littlest one. But again, it requires photographic evidence, and again, I didn't take a picture.
I could tell you about my exceedingly busy day, but that's certainly not very interesting.
Exceedingly. And that, my friends, is yet another possible blog topic. I'm watching Pride and Prejudice (Keira Knightly version) right now. I'm pretty sure I counted the use of that word ten times in a five minute period. Exceedingly exceeding, I'm sure. I've decided this is my least favorite Jane Austen movie. And I think I might like the Colin Firth version better. Exceedingly. But I think perhaps I should watch it again to be sure.
So there you have it. All the thoughts running through my brain. And one other little happy thought I'm not quite ready to share yet, although I will be exceedingly happy when I do so.
Thursday, March 06, 2008
A Soldier's Family by Cheryl Wyatt
The thing that's hard about promo-ing my friends' books is that it tends to sound like, "great writer, great friend, go buy the book." But truth is, all of those things are true. Cheryl's a great writer with a great voice. You know how you'll read a book by an author, think, "wow, this is fabulous, I want the rest of this author's books," and discover it's a New York Times bestseller with a huge backlist? Well, that'll be Cheryl in a few years.
Cheryl's got a love for military heroes, and I love her glimpse into the world of pararescue jumpers. I had no idea what a PJ was until I met Cheryl and read her stories. They are true heroes, and not just in Cheryl's books. If you like a good romance with a military hero, then definitely check out her Wings of Refuge series. If you missed her first book, it's still on sale on the eHarlequin.com website. You don't want to miss a single story.
About the book:
On A Crash Course With Love
She was the woman of pararescue jumper Manny Péna's dreams. But he'd stuck his foot in his mouth the last time he met Celia Munez. Now, grounded after a parachuting accident, he was desperate to make amends with the beautiful widow. But Celia wasn't having it. The last thing she needed was another man with a dangerous job—even if he had given his life to God. Yet Manny's growing commitment to her and her troubled son began to convince her that perhaps she should take her own leap of faith.
About the Author:
Cheryl Wyatt's closest friends would never dream the mayhem she plots during announcements at church. An RN-turned-SAHM, joyful chaos rules her home, and she delights in the stealth moments God gives her to write. She's convinced that having been born on a Naval base on Valentine's Day destined her to write military romance. She stays active in her church and in her laundry room. Both of her debut novels (Books 1 and 2 in her Wings of Refuge Series from Steeple Hill) have received Romantic Times Top Picks.
Visit Cheryl Wyatt on the Web : www.CherylWyatt.com
Or her blog www.Scrollsquirrel.blogspot.com
Wednesday, March 05, 2008
Thursday Thirteen #36: Vacation Edition
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Last week, I posted a happy blog about Spring. And then March, the snowiest month in Colorado, arrived. I can no longer see my backyard. I am depressed. So I thought what better way to forget the depressing weather that awaits than to blog about going on Vacation!!! Starting with planned vacations and ending with hoped-for vacations... 1. Silent Retreat. In just one more week, I'll be up in the mountains, enjoying a retreat with our church. Sadly, it won't involve sun, warm weather, massages, or anything remotely tropical, but it'll be a nice break. 2. Writer's Retreat. Our local ACFW chapter is planning a retreat for the end of April. Very much hoping to attend. That one's in the mountains, too. 3. May writer's conferences. Actually, I'm undecided on this. I want to go, but not sure I have the $$. There's a couple I'm looking at, so we'll see. 4. South Dakota. One of my dear friends lives up there and I'm thinking about going up for a long weekend with the family in July. 5. Illinois. Another trip I'd like to take to visit some friends- we've talked about this summer, but haven't set a date. 6. RWA San Francisco. End of July, first of August. That one's already reserved and mostly paid for. Just need the plane tickets. 7. ACFW Minneapolis. End of September. 8. Florida. Going to see my dad in January. 9. CRUISE!! January. It's a writer's conference. I'm teaching. Huh... most of this is work-related, isn't it? Not a lot of vacationing going on. But that's what's on my calendar already. So here's what I'd like to put on my calendar. 10. Pennsylvania. I really want (and need!) to visit my grandma. It'd also be a good chance to catch up with other family I haven't seen in a long time. 11. Someplace warm and sunny. Like NOW. At least I'll be doing that next January when it's super cold and yucky here. 12. Mexico. I've been there once, to build a church in a dusty town far away from anything resembling a beach. Some friends are there now, doing mission work in Puerta Vallarta, and I think I'd like to check it out. 13. Israel. Totally not happening this year, or probably any time real soon, but wanted to get it on my list, since I keep running into folks who are going in the near future. I miss that place. I lived there for a summer and loved it. Missed a lot of things I'm learning about now and need to go back and reconnect. So where are you escaping to this year? Or where would you like to escape to? ** Special thanks this week goes out to Hootin' Anni for her lovely header. |
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others' comments. It’s easy, and fun! Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!
View More Thursday Thirteen Participants
Saturday, March 01, 2008
Guest blogger: Camy Tang
Today, we've got a special guest blogger, my good friend, Camy Tang. And really, there's no better way to introduce her and her latest book, Only Uni, than her post about our friendship. I love Camy's books and their wonderful glimpses into ties that bond friends together. As a friend, she's got the formula figured out, and it definitely comes through in her writing.
***
I’m really excited to be guest blogging for Danica today. She was one of the first people to welcome me to the world of writing.
I’m totally serious (for once). When I first started writing again, I ended up on the Steeple Hill discussion boards because Steeple Hill was the first publisher I thought of when I thought of Christian romances. I’ve enjoyed Love Inspired romances for years and years.
The discussion boards were fabulously new to me. Suddenly there were all these Christian romance readers, writers, and even better, published authors chatting away. I lurked for a few days, then registered and introduced myself.
Danica is the board hostess and immediately made me feel welcome. So did everyone else, but Danica was the one who explained things to me (techno-ignorant as I was) and told me about discussion board etiquette.
I can’t begin to count the number of friends I made and the immense amount of information about writing that I learned. I would not be published today if not for those boards and those ladies and Danica.
I got to know her better when I went to Denver for ICRS a couple years ago. We had a BLAST hanging out with other friends late one night, singing bad karaoke in an almost unbelievably seedy bar and eating bland Mexican food.
(Yes, women can bond even over bland Mexican food.)
What was more, she actually seemed to LIKE me after spending several hours in my company. Imagine that! And her husband didn’t run screaming in the other direction when she introduced us (he obviously thought I was some OTHER Camy who was infinitely nicer and more sane than that loud, weird Camy who was on Danica’s online boards).
We have gotten closer in the past year (proven by her letting me run amok on her blog, here), and I hope we will always be good friends. She knows my bad habits and likes me anyway. And isn’t that the best sort of friend?
***
Danica again...
Yes friends, that is the best sort of friend. And I'm so thankful that I've got a friend like Camy, especially given that I was a total airhead friend today.
Insert embarrassed grin here... Got busy with work and stuff (had to work all day, you know!), and was just toodling along, checking email and realized... I'm a bad friend!! Camy was scheduled to blog today, and I forgot. Technically, it's still March 1st, but I'd hoped to get it up sooner. Maybe that's why we're such good friends. That whole, loving each other anyway. Love her, love her books, so do take the time to pick them up. You won't regret it.
Also, she's got a great contest going on right now, so stop by her website and check it out!
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